I'm nearly ready to give up

Good afternoon @Dimity and thankyou. My collages are literall cut and paste paper and double sided tape. Quick and not too messy and time consuming to clean up. If I think that it's going to be a big deal to tidy up afterwards, I usually talk myself out of doing it.

Good on you 👏, well done for starting to walk again. I think that you were very wise to not overdo it and get a taxi home. I felt that I had gone a bit too hard after no exercise for such a long time. I started thinking a couple of days ago that my pain in both upper and lower body are quite excessive right now. It didn't make sense that too much walking was causing so much agony in my upper body. I had a telehealth appointment yesterday with my psychiatrist and fortunately we had both come to the same conclusion. I have been taking an antidepressant, which also is helpful for chronic pain. As I've been reducing the dose to start a different antidepressant, my chronic pain has been exacerrbated. So we decided to go back to this antidepressant and scrap the new one. I am feeling more positive and hopeful with the knowledge that this unbearable pain will in the near future become more manageable.

It's great to hear that you have enjoyed a bit of sun. I can understand the contrast of the very cold nights. The house where I'm living gets so much colder than anywhere I've ever lived, and I lived in places where winter meant snow. There is possibly damp, but also the rear of the house never gets sun and therefore never warms up. The front rooms, including my bedroom and the loungeroom are so warm and cosy on sunny days, but still the temperature drops inside to degrees colder than outside (unless there is a southerly wind). I'm no expert in regards to house structures or insulation matters, all I know is that this house requires being close to the heater from 4:30pm onwards. I usually put my woolly dressing gown on when I leave the loungeroom in the evening to go to the toilet or kitchen or whatever. It is like going to another temperate zone. Interestingly, I saw a little bit of that English guy (who's name I can't think of right now) who does the amazing spaces and homes in small spaces, TV show. He was in Finland or Norway or somewhere Scandinivian in midwinter. Somebody had built an amazing viking long house style of accommodation. Because it was built in a country that expects freezing weather, all that was taken into consideration and it was a warming 25 degrees celsius inside this house. This house is never that warm inside in winter. People don't seem to construct housing in Australia with very cold temperatures in mind. I guess Australia is known for hot summers, beaches and desserts. That's our tourist angle anyway.

Anyway, not meant to take away from the fact that you are suffering from cold nights. It must be horrible. Do you have anything like, I have seen them advertised, one of those heated poncho things? I was wondering whether they were actually a help or a hindrance to keeping cosy.

Despite my chronic pain being fairly dominant, my hormone treatment is helping my mood no end. It is such a relief. I am emotionally okay now, so that I can work on all those things they suggest for helping my mental health (and physical health too). With the sunshine, I have walked nearly everyday. It's not a huge walk, but enough, and just doable for me right now. I have a rest halfway grabbing a coffee. The cafe people now say, "see you tomorrow" to me. That makes me buzz with gratitude and the feeling of acceptance. I suppose acceptance is another big issue that most of us on here have had problems with. I am so unused to that feeling that when it happens I weep actual tears. Probably a combination of happy and sad tears. Happy because it's glorious to feel liked, and sad because I have experienced very little of that in my life.

I actually turned on my laptop because I need to attend to a couple paperwork NDIS things. But I wanted to reply, to everybody that I have missed over the last few days when I have been too busy or too sore to log on. I hope to reply to everybody else in the next couple of days as the increased antidepressant eases my pain.

Take care @Dimity and I hope that you have sunshine and warmth.

Sorry to hear about your chronic pain @Katz42 . My chronic pain has reduced after suffering pain from another source that's now improving.

When I first started walking I experienced upper body pain. I still don't know why. I guess it lessened with time. It might be worth mentioning it to your gp though in case there's some other underlying problem like heart. Hope it's solved by rethinking your meds.

My place doesn't catch much sun. Wrong orientation and the neighbour's trees block winter sun into the spare room.

Someone else suggested a heated throw. My gas space heater is effective but expensive to run. I got a split system a/c but it seems to pull in cold draughts. I warm the bed with a electric underlay.

It's good you've connected with the baristas. I don't see anyone for weeks on end.

Take care and enjoy your weekend.