an honest discussion (tw suicide)

Hi @Eden1919 @Roses59 ,

How are you both?

We are looking forward to hearing from you.

I'm sorry if things have been tough going recently.

@Jasper_123 i try to break things into smaller tasks but even that is too much and then you just end up with even more little tasks so it isnt always a viable solution. i have support workers but they can only do so much.

@tyme honestly i am still struggling i am trying my best but i just feel terrible all the time and exhausted and idk it is hard to explain but everything is still too much and no matter how hard i try it is not enough to keep up with everything. idk i am at a loss for what to do and that just makes me feel even more like suicide is really my only viable option. idk i am safe for tonight i just feel like shit.

Are you putting too much pressure on yourself? @Eden1919

We are here for you.

No need to apologise @Eden1919,

It's lovely to hear from you again… I am sorry that you are still having such a hard time. From your original post, it sounds like you have a lot of commitments and that can be overwhelming trying to balance them and still take care of yourself in the process.

When I feel overwhelmed, it really helps to speak to someone like a counsellor. But in between those appointments, I've created a kind of support network I can lean on and is a part of my safety plan when I know I may be heading towards a crisis...

I access Beyond Blue or the SANE Forum when I just need to vent or talk, or Lifeline when I've reached a bit of a crisis point.

I'm wondering if you've accessed your universities counselling service? They could help support you with your study commitments and ensure that your lecturers know you just need a bit more time at the moment, so you can have a chance to take care of yourself.

And perhaps your support worker could help you with some of your household tasks, so things aren't so much for you at home? Such as helping you with the washing etc. Or they should be able to connect you with someone that can.

Here are some links with some supports for when you feel you need to speak to someone:

Crisis support:
- https://saneforums.org/t5/Need-Help-Now/ct-p/need-help-now

- https://www.sane.org/get-support
Which has the details of SANE's mental health professionals and ongoing guidance and support, which can connect you with counsellors and peer support worker through SANE's Guided Service (https://www.sane.org/referral)

Because if you are thinking thoughts of suicide then this is serious... and we are here for you.

I hope that today is better for you.

Know that you're not alone,

defaultusername

@tyme i dont think i am putting an unreasonable amount of pressure on myself i try to take it easy when i can but i have some very real deadlines and things like showering and brushing my teeth i have to do eventually and even then like it is too much idk it is just hard i cant keep up no matter how hard i try.

@defaultusername i have a psychologist and my support workers do what they can but it is hard because in order for them to help there are things i have to do first that only i can do so even getting them to help is a difficult task for me. it is just really hard and i am trying my best but that is not enough.

i am still not sure what to do long term if things keep going the way they are going then i probably shouldnt stay alive idk i havent decided anything yet and i am safe tonight i just i am really exhausted.

Thanks for sharing @Eden1919 ,

It's certainly good to have some boundaries and accountability in place so that you break your day up a bit. When you finally accomplish a task (no matter how large or small), would a little celebration or treat for yourself encourage you to keep going?

Hey there @Eden1919 🙂 🌺

Just wanted to say a kind and gentle hello to you, and to gently ask how youre going, if that is ok?

Just been reading through this thread, and I wanted to reach out a hand and see if you'd like someone to chat with this arvo 🙂

PinkFlamingo

@tyme treats dont work to encourage me i think because it isnt a motivation issue like i am motivated to do things i just cant do them idk it is hard to explain.

@Former-Member sorry i am only seeing this now. i am not going very well things are very overwhelming at the moment and i am struggling a lot if i am honest.

i am still carefully considering if i should be alive or not and while i havent made any decisions yet the list of reasons why i shouldnt be here is stacking up quite high. i am safe tonight but yeah just things arent looking very good at the moment.

Hi @Eden1919

How are you feeling today? How are your animals?

@8ppleTree my pets all died in the last 2 years so i have none anymore. as for how i am feeling i am not feeling good today.

i am feeling terrible today and i tried to contact lifeline last night but they were too busy to talk to me so i ended up just crying for a few hours and then i was tired and went to bed. i woke up feeling just as terrible and idk what to do anymore everything is going wrong and i dont feel ok at all and i keep thinking i shouldnt be here anymore. idk what to do i feel like giving up.