Its All Come To A Head

Dear Tryinghardto

It sounds as if you are in an overpoweringly negative situation at the moment, and that is affecting your illnesses and even threatening your life. Tryinghardto, suicide is never an option. If you ever find yourself thinking like that again call Lifeline on 13 11 14 (24 hours). There are trained counsellors at the end of the phone who would be happy to talk to you about your problems,or just listen if you prefer. You would be surprised what a difference talking to someone makes.

You certainly have problems with your ex, his ex and daughter. This is probably a situation which has built up over time, and is therefore very hard to change.. You were very wise to go to the emergency unit. You won't be able to sort all this out on your own. What I suggest is that if you don't have a plan already, go to your GP and ask him/her to refer you to a counsellor or psychologist. You may think it is their problem not yours, and that may be true, but you are the one who is suffering and you will find talking things over with a trained counsellor enormously helpful. They can help you sort out your problems and start to think of ways to deal with them. I know, because I am attending counselling at the moment, and it has given me great insight into my problems and has encouraged me to find solutions.

What about your OCD and severe depression? Are you being treated for these? There are a variety of medications you could take to lessen the symptoms, so I hope you are seeing a doctor who is looking after you. The counselling would also help with this.

It may feel as if your life is broken, but you are going through a temporary bad patch. What you need to do is learn to look after yourself and get yourself together again, and if that means seeking professional help then don't knock it back!

This isa terrible time of year to be having family issues, when everyone else seems to be full of Christmas cheer. Try to avoid any extra stress if you can. I know you are already under a lot of stress, but try to take care of yourself with a walk in the park, a coffee out or whatever distracts you. Right now you have to focus on YOU and how you are going to deal with the situation around you. Realise that YOU are a valuable, worth while human being and your wellbeing is important. Put yourself first for a change. For Christmas I bought myself a black T-shirt which has the white writing NO. on it. I bought it to remind myself that I do not want to deal with anyone else's crap, that I want to think of myself for a change.

Let us know how things work out for you - we on the on-line community are always ready to listen and tery to help,

Ellu

Hello @Tryinghardto,

I could not agree with @Ellu more, you have been through so much over such a long time no wonder you are really struggling to cope with it all at the moment. I am so glad you went to the hospital and had a friend who suggested that option for you, it is also really courageous you are sharing and wanting support from us on the forum.

I would strongly suggest making another appointment before christmas with your GP or a psychologist/psychiatrist/counsellor to discuss how you are not coping right now and how you can manage your self-care over the christmas period. It's really important you also review medication if that will help in any way?

I think you should be really focusing on yourself right now, the things that make you feel relaxed, happy, fulfilled, maybe write them down and be completely selfish for a month or two or three! And then these thoughts about your ex will hopefully become less powerful.

Please also use these helplines if you would just like to chat or get some support from someone when you are having those suicide thoughts:

Lifeline 13 11 14

Suicide Call back 1300 659 467

Here for you,

Lunar

Hi @Tryinghardto

I've been wondering how you are but didn't want to be pushy posting to you if you had stepped away from the forum..I'm so sorry it has come to a head like this. I can imagine that you would feel petrified and really unsteady now. I'm not really sure what to say to help that the others haven't already said. I'm so glad you were received kindly by the mental health nurse. Take it a day at a time again. I promise that things will get better without him over time but it is really hard to let go. Here if you need

Thank you everyone for your support. I have made an appointment with a new phsyciastrist on Friday to discuss my medication. I am absolutly terrified of changing. When I have been weaned on to something else I have always found mh OCD goes escessively hgh and I really cant live with that. Also went to see a GP this morning. She has recommended I visit a clinical psychologist who speciallises in cognitive therapy etc for people with OCD. However this psychologist is away on holidays and not back until February.

m a bit scared to live in my own head.

Still struggling how badly people can hurt the so called people they love 😞

Dear Tryinghardto,

I am so, so glad that you are seeing a new psychiatrist. Don't be frightened of changing medications. There are so many medications out there, some which work for some peopleand some which work for others. Explain your concerns to the psychiatrist and I am sure that he/she will take them into consideration.

I am concerned that you can't see a clinical psychologist until February. You really need someone now. Go back to your GP and stress that you want to see someone urgently - they can ring around and find someone who is available for you.I think this is especially important now, in the Christmas season, when all kinds of memories and thoughts are stirred up. This is not about them, this is about YOU straightening out your life and making a new life for yourself. You do not need to live with such suffering. You deserve a happy, settled life, and you are taking all the right steps. You are a worhwhile, unique human being - take time each day to do something nice for yourself and remember that things are only going to get better.

Ellu

Thank you again. Ellu I echo your thoughts. Apparently the GP has a list of other cliical pscycologists who are local. She stressed they want me to find someone who works with OCD and cognitive work. Im going to get this list this morning and go through and make some calls. What scares me is what do I do if I cant get someone earlier to help?

Then you have all of us to fall back on @Tryinghardto. I know it's not the same but somewhere to feel safe and talk about your worries. I think all you can do is try and see what happens. Going back to living day to day or hour to hour is probably what is needed.

You could try ringing the sane helpline to see if there were any resources they knew of to help out as well ph 1800 18 7263.

Depression is bad enough but this OCD is bloody killing me. Cant get these thoughts out of my head and feel like I am going mad