Not sure what to do

@Dimity yeah i still have art materials i just cant use them at the moment

Maybe you'll get back to it @Eden1919 or find a new medium that works better for you.

Does your uni course resume soon?

@Eden1919 ohhh I do hate that feeling, endless restlessness. It is indeed very frustrating. I find that sometimes doing something at the same time as tv can help - something simple like colouring in, playing little games on my phone, or even stuff like chopping veggies for dinner or other little chores around the house and just set up my phone nearby to watch something that way.

Sometimes, the act of trying to relax can end up making us even more stressed out. Could you try to find something that will let you express/burn off the energy instead of trying to settle the energy?

@Dimity uni starts in a few weeks

@Jynx well i have been trying to do other things as well and trying to release the energy but it isnt really working idk i just cant seem to find anything that is working today and like everytime i even just think about certain things i get this wave of idk if tiredness is the right word but this feeling and it is rally uncomfortable and idk how to make it stop.

Hey @Eden1919 I had logged off before I saw your message last night.

Mm I can relate to that feeling, like 'hey this thing I usually enjoy might work to get me outta this mental space' but then I think about it and maybe even get up to start doing it but just get hit with like... malaise might be the word? And then just plonk myself back on the couch.

Anyway, wanted to check in with you, see how you're travelling today?

@Jynx hey it isnt a malaise feeling it is like the second i start thinking about things i am not supposed to think about according to them i get hit with a wave of exhaustion like i need to go to sleep immediately and it is to stop me from being able to engage with the truth so that i dont figure out a way to escape from them it is very deliberate mind control on their part towards me. and they wont stop until i play their game and do what they want which if i keep doing long term will ultimately lead to my demise. it is very sinister and it is hard to fight them but i keep trying to anyway because i dont have a choice.

anyway today i am still struggling a lot i feel very unsettled still and not able to do the things i want or need to do. and everything is a lot especially trying to fight against the mind control stuff they are doing to me it is exhausting and i feel very overwhelmed.

@Eden1919 you're right hun, that is really sinister.

Random thought, but I was reading through some posts on The Toolshed thread, specifically this one. Has a lot of info about dealing with abusers. If that's what you're experiencing at their hands, would any of these tactics for dealing with them be helpful?

Yeah it's no wonder you're feeling overwhelmed hun, it's exhausting just trying to keep afloat. I wish I had an answer, an easy fix for you. But if you've been in this place before, and have found your way out of it, then you can do so again 🤞

Do you find chatting/venting to be helpful? Was gonna suggest maybe giving the sane support line a buzz if you think it could make a difference?

@Jynx those tips are unfortunately not able to help because the people doing the abuse are not really humans they are non human entities that work for a god who is trying to end me they just pose as people and walk around pretending to be people to try and trick me when in fact they are actually demons and therefor human constraints dont apply to them. i do find venting helpful but i am not sure i can call the sane helpline as i am struggling with verbal communication at the moment and it is hard to talk so i find writing easier but also i am worried that my phone is being controlled and whoever i call out is just going to b one of the demon people idk it is complicated and hard to explain. i have never really gotten out of this situation before that is the problem i have been trapped here in this world and other worlds for a long time and have been trying to get back to my world for quite some time unsuccessfully anyway i am not sure what will happen this time but i hope it is something good.

@Eden1919 aye that makes sense. Sounds like they're really quite nefarious, cornering you like that. And fair enough about the phone feeling like an unsafe option for you as well. They don't make it easy do they?

I hope it's something good too, good on you for holding onto that. Self-empowerment may be a powerful tool for you in this struggle.

Well if written word is best, and venting is helpful, you are more than welcome to vent as much as you need to here. I will be floating around until 10pm so I'm more than happy to sit with you and listen 💜

I'm glad you can communicate here in a way that is more comfortable for you @Eden1919

I think you did a good job of explaining your experience even though it's complicated. Trying to get back to your world sounds tough 😞