Ups and Downs of Husband`s Mental Illness

Yes still with Sis @Shaz51

Enjoy your cuppa 😁

sure am @Former-Member and thinking of you lots

Mum wants to book us in to do regular gardening

@Former-Member, @Owlunar

Hi everyone been a long time. I was in a pretty bad situation last time that I'm force to a decision last July 2019 to leave my partner due to his drug induced psychosis that I felt I'm not safe anymore. I ended up in a women's shelter as I don't have money left to rent a place for myself. I'm in a pretty bad situation as I'm here on a temporary partner visa , making decision is really hard. I love him. But what can I do ? If I'm being accused letting someone In the house or sleeping with someone else And worst being accused of coming to his life to mess him up. It's so hard. I faced humiliation when he rang my work mate , church people whom I don't know much other than attending church with them. In the end I got burned out. Because I just give and give , agree and agree as I'm tired. Then he came back to my life again promise to be clean and will take his meds and seek professional help. I already moved to another place. At first he help me move my stuff and then later on decided to live with me. At first it's ok. But now I find it very exhausting. I only work 5 hrs a day but it's seemed like I'm working 24hrs a day. He work 12 hrs per shift and would make me feel guilty if he does some house chores. With this Covid 19 , he has excuse not to see doctor . He has not taken his meds since March and I can feel the difference. He said he doesn't need his meds anymore and it's making him feel like a zombie at work. Everytime we have an argument and his psychosis comes out . Like feeling someone is in the house when he's not here , or I invite a boyfriend which is all purely accusations. I ended up as a prisoner of my own home. I work and pays all the rent ,bills and food. He would once in a while do grocery but he would make it feel like I owe him something. Everytime we have argument he would threaten to leave me and I would simply say just leave coz any person doesn't deserve to be treated like this. The next day he would come back and pretend nothing happen and if I try to talk about it he will tell me I have to forgive him as he have schizophrenia. One time I told him when u needed an excuse being a j*rk , u have mental illness , but if told to seek professional help you don't have mental illness. I just feel trapped and to the point of breaking down. My every move is checked my stuff is check , my make up , my clothes to my used undies. I'm trying to be brave to send this coz he's at work and this is my only outlet. I've no one to talk to as I'm isolated. So I do ask for anyone to pray for me.

Hi Maryjune, one of the mods here. Just sent you an email. All the best.

Ohhhhh @Maryjune

sending you tender hugs

It has been a while since we have heard from you , glad to see you are back xx

letting you know you are not alone my friend

@eth, @Owlunar , @Former-Member , @Bunniekins , @Faith-and-Hope , @Smc , @outlander

ohhh @Maryjune been thinking of you all day today xx

are you ok

@Shaz51

Checking in on you.

hello and sorry @Former-Member

looks like I am 3 days late here

been busy this week catching up

last week was a slack week due to soo much rain and my infection

tonight both of us are aching all over , everything hurts when getting up and moving xx

@Maryjune, @Owlunar , @eth , @Former-Member , @outlander , @Adge