Hello @Blueberry 

you asked --- Have you found looking after yourself to get easier with time?-- yes and no because you don`t know when the unexpected will happen , if that makes sense
Mine Biggest thing that I am still learning is Balance , as I have also 4 stepchildren who are adults now and an85 year old mum who is still recovering from a big bowel surgery
Developing a sense of balance
Supporting someone who has a mental illness is helped by balancing a realistic understanding of how the illness has affected the person with a hopeful determination to help them achieve as great a level of recovery and independence as possible.
Talk to the treating health professionals or staff at a support organisation for advice on how to do this.
A balanced attitude means:
- a balance of expectation – sometimes we expect too much of someone, sometimes we expect too little. Try to adjust your expectations to the person’s capabilities at the time
- a balance of help – sometimes we try to do too much for someone, sometimes we do too little. Try to be involved at a level that is in the best interest of the person you care for and that is fair to yourself and others
- a balance of emotion – sometimes we are overemotional, sometimes we withdraw emotionally. Try to show concern in a caring and matter-of-fact way, avoiding being over-emotional or unemotional
- a balance of time – sometimes we may give someone too much time, sometimes we may have too little time for them. Try to share time between the person who has a mental illness and other family and friends. Make sure you have time to yourself too
- a balance of activity – sometimes we may give the person too much to do, sometimes we may leave them too little to do. Try to encourage a level of stimulating, healthy activity that is realistic, and at times that suit everyone.