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Sometimes I feel like I’m on top of things and don’t feel like my trauma defines me and I don’t feel so ashamed and scared. Other times I want to hide from the world and feel like a **** (I’m not going to say the word here since I don’t want to trigger anyone) 😭, I feel so ashamed that I don’t want people to know
Hi just want you to know I have transgenerational trauma and cptsd. I am with you in the memory challenge. With you in spirit.
In response to: Oscillation between two mind sets
PizzaMondoSenior Contributor
Re: Oscillation between two mind sets
Sitting with you too @creative_writer - here with @Shaz51
I also second what @tyme asked earlier.. I am also familiar with the feeling that I am annoying others, and have been personally able to identify how that came about for me. For me, from childhood, my needs did not matter, so now as an adult, through a lot of therapy and an overhaul of my life, I aim to give myself that voice and prioritise my needs. I matter, I am worthy, just like you matter, and you are worthy too @creative_writer
What's on your mind right now?
In response to: Re: Oscillation between two mind sets
creative_writerSenior Contributor
Re: Oscillation between two mind sets
Hi @Radarears it’s nice to meet you. CPTSD and generational is tough. Sending you hugs 💖🫂
@PizzaMondo it’s hard putting your needs first when you’ve grown up otherwise.
I just have a lot of pent up energy, racing thoughts and have had SI and intrusive thoughts of trauma entering my brain. I’m safe but I feel very unsettled. I feel all of these emotions crawling deep inside me, I just want to scream.
In response to: Re: Oscillation between two mind sets
JynxModerator
Re: Oscillation between two mind sets
Hey @creative_writer sorry to hear that your emotions are kicking up such a storm inside at the moment. Here for you hun - would a discussion about your feelings help? Or maybe a distraction from them?
In response to: Re: Oscillation between two mind sets
RadarearsSenior Contributor
Re: Oscillation between two mind sets
🫠🤪
In response to: Re: Oscillation between two mind sets
creative_writerSenior Contributor
Re: Oscillation between two mind sets
@Jynx I feel fed up, I want it over with but I know I can’t just give in. I had a shower, it distracted me for a bit.
@Radarears I hope you are doing okay 💖
In response to: Re: Oscillation between two mind sets
JynxModerator
Re: Oscillation between two mind sets
Showers are one of my favs @creative_writer I like to imagine all the woes of my day being scrubbed away.
Got much on tonight? Gotta do some study or anything?
In response to: Re: Oscillation between two mind sets
creative_writerSenior Contributor
Re: Oscillation between two mind sets
@Jynx I ought to study but the thoughts are still loud 😞. Probably will have dinner soon. Do you have much planned for tonight?
In response to: Re: Oscillation between two mind sets
JynxModerator
Re: Oscillation between two mind sets
Aye could be very distracting @creative_writer... or perhaps the study could distract from the thoughts? Always a roll of the dice haha.
Not much, I will see if I have energy to head to the shops after I finish, I wanna get ingrdients for my next meal prep. Annnd I got way too many dishes piled up to get to as well lol.
In response to: Re: Oscillation between two mind sets
creative_writerSenior Contributor
Re: Oscillation between two mind sets
@Jynx I can’t get myself to study, my brain just keeps drifting to the thoughts. Tried some prayers, the thoughts persist. I guess I have to keep up with self care and hope it’ll lessen.
I hope you are able to get whatever you need to get done tonight.
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