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I thought I'd start a discussion where we can check in with members and use this space to keep in contact. It's a space to be able to say how you really feel and it's a space for the good, the bad and the ugly moments in our lives.
In response to: Just checking in.
CheerBearSenior Contributor
In response to: Re: Just checking in.
Zoe7Senior Contributor
Feeling for you so very much @CheerBear Some decisions we have to make in life are difficult either way - it is no wonder you feel stuck right now - you are going through so much CB 
Whatever decision you make with have lasting implications either way but you are the best one to know what you can deal with here Hon and it is ultimately your decision. None of this is easy but we are here with you in whatever direction you take CB 
In response to: Re: Just checking in.
TeejSenior Contributor
@CheerBear I’ve been talking in therapy lots about a very big decision I made years ago that I’ve regretted. I’ve been reassured lots that the decision I made was made with the best intentions and was the best decision at that time. I think that is all you can go by now. The decision you make is the right one for you now. As I’ve learned the hard way regretting those decisions doesn’t make anything better. You are so good at getting on with it once you’ve made a decision. I think this will be no different what you decide.
I miscarried one of mine after jinxing myself. The day before I had said that technically my odds of that one were low knowing that 1 in 4 pregnancies miscarry. (And nope I don’t suggest that as an option for you 😘) We has just told everyone as well. I know it’s different but for a while I was hooked into wondering if that was my girl. I think regret is something that we all have but indulging in it isn’t healthy. Maybe you can make the choice that whatever you decide was the best decision you could make at the time. It also doesn’t mean that you would make the same decision next time if it happened. I recently saw someone for pro choice talk about her experiences. She had had a mix of both experiences, keeping and not keeping. I believe that it doesn’t have to be black and white.
Im not saying this is easy or not so very fueled with emotion but you can do this. What ever you decide you have a huge support team here and I suspect irl as much as possible too. Trust yourself. There will be a right decision for you just now and that will be the one you make. It can’t be wrong or wrapped up in the future. Can you do a weighted pros and cons (like the one in the DBT manual)? Just writing it on paper might help you to bring you to the present without beating yourself up. Sorry for fix it brain.
PS if you just need someone to sit with you through this I can do that too. Please tell us if that is more helpful 💜
In response to: Re: Just checking in.
TeejSenior Contributor
PPS @CheerBear I have a doc appointment in an hour followed by seeing my therapist and some food shopping so I’ll be in and out for a bit.
In response to: Re: Just checking in.
TeejSenior Contributor
@CheerBear Found these for you
The bottom one kind of spoke to me. There is a whole life ahead. Chaos is part of our life, even when we have something to do with creating it. You can remind me of this I’m sure in the future. 😘
In response to: Re: Just checking in.
CheerBearSenior Contributor
In response to: Re: Just checking in.
Zoe7Senior Contributor
Just like @Teej said @CheerBear we are here for you for whatever you need both through all this and as ongoing support. This is indeed one of the hardest things you or anyone has to decide and therefore know that our support for you is unwavering. There are no real words that can help ease this kind of pain for you as it is a decision you have to make knowing there will be repercussions for you on both sides - that is so very hard to deal with. If you need to keep talking then do so and if you need us to sit quietly with you then say - you are who matters right now Hon and we will follow your lead throughout this with you and for you 💜💙💚🧡💛
In response to: Re: Just checking in.
TeejSenior Contributor
@CheerBear I hope you managed to distract and have some down time this afternoon.
I totally understand how hard this is given everything you’ve written. I’m not going to take you back down that track again tonight (unless it’s helpful for you) but I wanted to acknowledge what you wrote. So many big feels there. Will be around tomorrow if you need to talk.
Changing the subject to leave my post on a less heavy note for @CheerBear. I’ve had a full on day where everything didnt go to plan but it’s ok. By the time I got to my therapist I was completely blank and very very scattered. Couldn’t string two words together 😳:face_with_rolling_eyes:. I’ve had an upset tummy for a couple of weeks now. It’s not happy with the iron tablets but instead of constipation I have the other side of things, and I’m not able to keep food in my system, and when it leaves it’s green 🤦♀️. @Mazarita I’ve been thinking about you for the last few weeks knowing how frustrating it must be at times. Today I broke wind (and thank goodness that’s all it was) in the shop and pretty much cleared out the shop. I had to get out of there so quick 😳😳😳. One of my favourite movie quotes of all times is from the castle when they win the court case and he turns and says 'suffer in your jocks'. It’s always felt like the best saying without being really nasty. I think that’s been me a bit. I’m now off iron tablets and I hope there is less jock suffering to be had😜. My fave quote kind of shows what a dag I really am 😝.
Have a good night all. 💜🤗😘
In response to: Just checking in.
Faith-and-HopeSenior Contributor
💜💐 @Teej .....
In response to: Re: Just checking in.
Faith-and-HopeSenior Contributor
❤️❤️❤️ @CheerBear .....
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Help us push aside the stigma and discrimination surrounding complex mental health and change the way people talk about, and care for, mental illness.
SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.
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