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Unknown userMember
I thought I'd start a discussion where we can check in with members and use this space to keep in contact. It's a space to be able to say how you really feel and it's a space for the good, the bad and the ugly moments in our lives.
In response to: Just checking in.
Unknown userMember
In response to: Just checking in.
utopiaSenior Contributor
In response to: Just checking in.
utopiaSenior Contributor
In response to: Re: Just checking in.
Zoe7Senior Contributor
I have come to the conclusion that no matter how much I want to try to make connections with people and how much I want to trust there is no reason to do so. There is nothing more I can do. I finally started to develop a friendship and a trust in someone and it ended abruptly – no reason, no warning, no explanation. I just don’t understand what I did wrong. I truly cared for this person and felt a connection that allowed me to be myself. Maybe who I am is not someone that anyone wants to know or be around. At this point I honestly don’t care. I have spent most of my life just ‘existing’ and was starting to feel that I could move forward and actually start ‘living’.
I never thought that there would be anyone in my life again that I would let my guard down enough to let in. I have been very good in the past at pushing people away when they start to get too close in order to protect myself from any further hurt or pain – this time I didn’t. This time it hurts so much more because I truly believed I could trust again and I honestly don’t know what I did wrong.
I don’t want to live in the past but now I can’t see a way forward. I’m not depressed, I’m not numb, I’m not looking for help or for answers – I’m just done. I don’t want to feel, I don’t want to move past this, I don’t want to simply ‘exist’.
This is no-one’s fault and no-one is to blame for this – it is solely on me. However I got here – my feelings are mine. I am certainly no-one important in this world and will soon be forgotten about – and whatever it is that I have done to cause anyone else any hurt will no longer be able to happen – that I see as a good thing.
In response to: Re: Just checking in.
Unknown userMember
hi @Zoe7
you sound so low and im a bit worried about you. Can you call lifeline or tell someone how you are feeling? seems like things are really overwhelming at the moment.
you're a lovely, kind and supportive person. If you read your post and it was written by someone else can you imagine what you might say to them or want them to do? please be safe
lj
In response to: Just checking in.
TABSenior Contributor
In response to: Re: Just checking in.
Shaz51Senior Contributor
Ohhhhh are you ok @Zoe7 my sister
oh I want to give ou a big hug
In response to: Re: Just checking in.
Unknown userMember
Hi @Zoe7,
I know you must feel devastated by your loss but maybe this person was feeling the same as you. I know I have spent so much time pushing people I really care about away over the last few years through nothing they've done wrong but as a coping mechanism for me. Maybe its a case of "I have been very good in the past at pushing people away when they start to get too close in order to protect myself from any further hurt or pain" for this person too and you've done nothing wrong. I've even done it on the forum here too occasionally.
Please know you have a beautiful caring soul and although you are feeling heartbroken now there will be a chance to develop trusting relationships again. I know you are still at the very fragile stage as are many of us which leave us open to be wounded so much easier. As we get stronger and heal more well hopefully be able to be able to fully trust again.
Not long after I started on here I had a really intense 'online relationship' with a forum member, luckily not many remember 😳. Anyway it was part of me being so desperate to be accepted and I so desperately wanted to trust again and felt connected with this person. It was much safer to me that it was online. In this case both of us were bitten and it took a while to get past.
Please look after you. I see so many amazing and beautiful qualities to you. You deserve to trust again and have relationships. Maybe as you heal more it will happen again more successfully. I'm not sure what happened for you and this person but I'm sure you can move on from it. You have us to fall back on 💜🤗💐
In response to: Re: Just checking in.
Faith-and-HopeSenior Contributor
Oh @Zoe7 .... I was so pleased to see your beautiful butterfly, then read the content of your post to find you gave been so hurt ... ❣
@utopia has just gone through a similar experience .... I just can't understand how some people operate that way ... 😳:face_with_rolling_eyes:😔 .... grrr ....
I wish I could be with you to care for you today .... I am with you here .... we have known you for a short time here on the forums, but the warmth and beauty of your nature is easily evident. Please just rest yourself .... whatever it was that caused that person to move away is nothing up to do with you, or tgere would have been a defining moment, a point where you could have said, oh, okay .... I see what happened ....
Without that moment, the onus and fault is on them. There is no excuse for that sort of rudeness, but there is likely a reason .... their reason, not yours .... a pattern of behaviour in their life or a damaging experience of relationships in their past that has left them unable to cope wth respectable behaviour ...
❤️💕🌷❤️💕🌷❤️
Hugs n hugs @Zoe7 .... keep yourself safe .... this is a bubble of emptiness you are floating in, a protective shell to rest in .... a cocoon .... your butterfly will re-emerge .... breathe ... rest .... holding you ....
In response to: Just checking in.
TABSenior Contributor
Help us push aside the stigma and discrimination surrounding complex mental health and change the way people talk about, and care for, mental illness.
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Help us push aside the stigma and discrimination surrounding complex mental health and change the way people talk about, and care for, mental illness.
SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.
SANE values diversity. We are committed to providing a safe, culturally appropriate, and inclusive service for all people, regardless of their ethnicity, faith, disability, sexuality, or gender identity.
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