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not feeling good

BlueBaySenior Contributor

not feeling good

At the moment i am not feeling good. i feel like my body is in 'run away mode'. i feel my body is running on a high, my head is so mixed up. i have to go to bed and try to sleep, but don't know if i can.

my hormones are everywhere at the moment; my mood is sky high negative. i can't deal with this anymre. all of a sudden i am not feeling good. i think it is anxiety.

i don't know why i feel like this; i just want to cry but can't becsue everyone is home. i am going to bed. i don't know what is going on. actually maybe it is anxiety because i felt like passing out today.

I went to my GP to have my mirena IUD taken out as I had had enough. But he couldn't find the string, so he sent me for a ultrasound. Had that and the guy said i had two fibroids and a cyst on my ovary. but he couldn't find the string either, so had to have an xray to find the metal piece. they didn't tell me anything. but while waiting i was so anxious i almost passed out.

so now i have to wait for tomorrow when my GP will call me at work and let me know what will happen now. hopefully he can take the mirena out. i don't know.

my body is reacting to my anxiety - i feel so shaky, i need to stop. no point telling anyone at home becasue (a) they won't believe me and (b) they prob wouldn't care.

sorry, i had to tell someone. i feel so alone 😞

12926 replies

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In response to: not feeling good

BlueBaySenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Thankyou lovely @Zoe7

think I need to go to bed.

I need to write a list fir my doctor for tomorrow

In response to: Re: not feeling good

Zoe7Senior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Write the list first then BB then go to bed. Goodluck with your appointment in the morning @BlueBay I'll be thinking of you Hon

In response to: Re: not feeling good

Shaz51Senior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

thinking of you and sitting with you sister @BlueBay

do your list first xx I need to write in my tonight , I keep forgetting to do it xoxo

In response to: Re: not feeling good

Faith-and-HopeSenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

@BlueBay .... it's okay to be minimal in how you interact with someone who has upset you ....

Something I do is think of doing that as a bit of a "time out" from a relationship. It is possible to stay functioning within the same space, but only speak when you have to, and politely .... like "pass the salt pleas" sort of thing .... Imagine that there is an invisible bubble around you that protects you from their presence within the same space, and that might help you to not feel the need to run away so much ..... having a sheild up like that, even an imaginary one, can help you find your own space within the space, and put others and their ideas, opinions, needs, wants and behaviours outside your space ..... and it ends up not mattering whether they realise you have done that or not ..... it matters for you.

Hugs Hon .... I hope you sleep well 💙

In response to: Re: not feeling good

BlueBaySenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Thankyou fir last night @Faith-and-Hope@Shaz51@Zoe7@outlander

I’m sngry self destructive and self sabotaging

sad my doctor snd he is challenging me to think positive. I told him I csnt thst every time i get emotional or upset the negative mind thoughts go into automatic pilot. Snd it’s so difficult to get out if it. It takes time fir me to settle back down sometimes days

right now I’m in thst “I don’t care snymire my lufe is over “ mood. I’m sngry because I am taking meds. I’m sngry because I just sm.

I need to stop and have a coffee. I need to stop or else .....

I hate being so angry so destructive

I hate me so much.

In response to: Re: not feeling good

outlanderSenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

@BlueBay
Are you still seeing your psychologist? I can totally understand your anger but with help you can learn to manage it. Challanging yourself to think positive is ok too but sometimes you need to sit down with someone explore as well as work through that anger and work out some methods that help you to let the anger go abit but in a healthy way so you dont become self destructive. Its not an overnight fix but because its affecting your life quite alot i think it would be worth talking about with your psychologist.

Something that i find helpful is something very simple. Roll up some socks into pairs but a tighter ball and throw them as hard as you can at the wall or the floor. I tend to keep a few just kep a few in a small container in my room so they are ready if i need. Maybe this would work for you as well.

In response to: Re: not feeling good

Zoe7Senior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Hi @BlueBay Hearing you Hon - it is incredibly tough to get out of that negaitve thinking but you can do it - think about Ayla and keep busy ...that is when you clear your mind a little and can have postiive thoughts replacing those negative ones.

In response to: Re: not feeling good

BlueBaySenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Thankyou @Zoe7@outlander

I’m scared I’m getting worse

My emotions snd thoughts are everywhere

how sm I meant to “be or think positive” when I’m so caught up with my emotions

it’s hard

my doctor says that I’m improving - really? Nit when I’m feeling like this how does he know

he told me I’ll be the last person to notice it

i hate it so much being challenged

I’m such a negative person

will I ever get better - I don’t know I’m so scared I’ll never be better

I’m scared this is me forever

do I want change / yes I do but I’m so scared I fear so much

oh this is dumb it’s nit making sense

I’m just a bad person who csnt even get my shit together 😢

In response to: Re: not feeling good

Hope4meSenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Hi @BlueBay

I'm here if you want to chat. I hear you about being scared the suffering will go on forever. It's one of our curses eh...

Do you want to talk about it?

Hope

In response to: Re: not feeling good

BlueBaySenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Thsnks @Hope4me

I don’t know if I csn ever get through this

I’ve been dealing with this for 8 yrs.

im tired if all of this.

I’m over it.

I’m frustrated angry overwhelmed sad really sad

I just it all to STOP

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