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not feeling good

BlueBaySenior Contributor

not feeling good

At the moment i am not feeling good. i feel like my body is in 'run away mode'. i feel my body is running on a high, my head is so mixed up. i have to go to bed and try to sleep, but don't know if i can.

my hormones are everywhere at the moment; my mood is sky high negative. i can't deal with this anymre. all of a sudden i am not feeling good. i think it is anxiety.

i don't know why i feel like this; i just want to cry but can't becsue everyone is home. i am going to bed. i don't know what is going on. actually maybe it is anxiety because i felt like passing out today.

I went to my GP to have my mirena IUD taken out as I had had enough. But he couldn't find the string, so he sent me for a ultrasound. Had that and the guy said i had two fibroids and a cyst on my ovary. but he couldn't find the string either, so had to have an xray to find the metal piece. they didn't tell me anything. but while waiting i was so anxious i almost passed out.

so now i have to wait for tomorrow when my GP will call me at work and let me know what will happen now. hopefully he can take the mirena out. i don't know.

my body is reacting to my anxiety - i feel so shaky, i need to stop. no point telling anyone at home becasue (a) they won't believe me and (b) they prob wouldn't care.

sorry, i had to tell someone. i feel so alone 😞

12926 replies

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In response to: not feeling good

Zoe7Senior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

@BlueBay Did you hear back from your doctor? How are those feelings sitting with you today?

In response to: Re: not feeling good

BlueBaySenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Hi @Zoe7

no never heard back.

Im home feeling numb. No actual strong emotions just nothing. Dissociating a bit.

In response to: Re: not feeling good

Zoe7Senior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

That is not good @BlueBay - I often prefer numb to emotions as it is easier to deal with but I get that it is not a good place to be sitting either.

How is your asthma and breathing today?

In response to: not feeling good

Shaz51Senior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

hi @BlueBay, thinking of you lots

In response to: Re: not feeling good

BlueBaySenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

@Zoe7

asthma is better, still a bit of a cough.

I'm seeing my gp in the morning, he wants to listen to my lungs again to make sure there is no secondary infection.

i have no plans to do anything atm. my thoughts are buried and hidden, my mind is blank. not sure which is better being numb or feeling an emotion.

hope you are okay.

In response to: Re: not feeling good

BlueBaySenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Hi @Shaz51

thank you for your thoughts

In response to: Re: not feeling good

Zoe7Senior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Glad you are seeing your GP tomorrow BB

I find not feeling those emotions I can get through the day easier sometimes but also know that it can be just as draining not feeling them as it is feeling them @BlueBay.

Make sure to still do things for yourself - lots of self-care -and we are here with you Hon

In response to: Re: not feeling good

BlueBaySenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

@Zoe7

Dear Zoe

I’m still struggling after your reply to me last night and I need to write this to you. It’s been on my mind all night and todsy. I felt very hurt by your comments.

I realise that it hurts you when I say that no-one cares. I know you have helped me many times, but when i get to an emotional or vulnerable place that is hard for me to see. I don't want to hurt you and really appreciate your support. Please realise that when I am in a vulnerable space and say no-one cares, I do this not because i am trying to hurt you, but because i am in a bad place and struggling. And most times when I’m in a vulnerable place I can’t see what I write.

I don’t want to lose the friendship and connection we have made on the forum. I know the feeling of abandonment by a forum member snd I certainly don’t want to feel that again.

I hope we can move past this. I value your support so much.

BB ❤️

In response to: Re: not feeling good

BlueBaySenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Is there a @Former-Member around

need to talk pls

In response to: Re: not feeling good

outlanderSenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

@BlueBay is there anything i can help with?
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