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not feeling good

BlueBaySenior Contributor

not feeling good

At the moment i am not feeling good. i feel like my body is in 'run away mode'. i feel my body is running on a high, my head is so mixed up. i have to go to bed and try to sleep, but don't know if i can.

my hormones are everywhere at the moment; my mood is sky high negative. i can't deal with this anymre. all of a sudden i am not feeling good. i think it is anxiety.

i don't know why i feel like this; i just want to cry but can't becsue everyone is home. i am going to bed. i don't know what is going on. actually maybe it is anxiety because i felt like passing out today.

I went to my GP to have my mirena IUD taken out as I had had enough. But he couldn't find the string, so he sent me for a ultrasound. Had that and the guy said i had two fibroids and a cyst on my ovary. but he couldn't find the string either, so had to have an xray to find the metal piece. they didn't tell me anything. but while waiting i was so anxious i almost passed out.

so now i have to wait for tomorrow when my GP will call me at work and let me know what will happen now. hopefully he can take the mirena out. i don't know.

my body is reacting to my anxiety - i feel so shaky, i need to stop. no point telling anyone at home becasue (a) they won't believe me and (b) they prob wouldn't care.

sorry, i had to tell someone. i feel so alone 😞

12926 replies

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In response to: not feeling good

BlueBaySenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Thsnks @Zoe7 and @Faith-and-Hope for your replies.
I do understand what you're saying that I'm not well and when hubby doesn't hear me he doesn't talk to me I feel he doesn't love me and me too. I guess once I start to feel better it will all work out fine. I haven't felt the love for a while now prob since I've been unwell.

In response to: not feeling good

BlueBaySenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

I want to run away. I could easily grab my handbag and walk out of the hospital. No one would know. It's easy.
I'm feeling upset and just hurt. I am angry at my mum fir her actions. I've got my sisters birthday next week and that means I have to see my brother. I don't want to see him. Wish he wasn't going.
I'm scared. I just want to go away.
Sh is on my mind tonight. I'm crying. In my room alone.
@Zoe7 @Faith-and-Hope what shld I do?

In response to: not feeling good

Faith-and-HopeSenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Talk to the staff there @BlueBay ..... you are there to receive support, and a large part of that support is in helping you to process the strains you are under.

In response to: Re: not feeling good

Zoe7Senior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

100% agree with @Faith-and-Hope here @BlueBay - talk to the staff there. You can only receive that support if you let them know what is going on for you. We are here for you but we cannot give you the level of support you need when you are feeling like this - you need to reach out and ask for help from those that are there for you to help you while you are in hospital

In response to: not feeling good

BlueBaySenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

I'm leaving hospital tomorrow. I'm scared anxious and not sure it's the right thing. My psych thinks it's the right thing as if I stay longer I will rely on hospital too much.
I feel I will leave and haven't achieved much. I told my psych I wish I could stay longer.
Told him I'm so overwhelmed and stressed with looking for work. He understands the pressure I'm under. Talked about the party on Saturday and my abuser (brother) will be there.
I also told him I wanted to Sh last night and also run away from the hospital. I told him it would have been easy to walk out. He asked what stopped me I replied it was the sleeping med the nurse gave me made me sleep.
I need s job niw I need money. Can't live like this. It's too hard. I feel so stressed. I also told my psych I felt like ending my life because everything felt too much at the moment.
I don't know anymore.

In response to: not feeling good

BlueBaySenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Forgot to tag @Zoe7 @Faith-and-Hope @utopia

In response to: Re: not feeling good

Zoe7Senior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

I suspect that the pary - and who will be there - is making things extra hard right now @BlueBay As hard as it is going to be - remember you are going for your sister and you want to be there. There is no denying how very, very hard it is going to be for you but remember you can leave at any time and we are here with you.

There are some things you cannot control right now - and not having another job is one of them - keep looking - it is hard i know but you have to try to make do with what you have until you do find another job - not easy but do-able.

As for feeling so stressed - try to breathe BB - calm yourself as much as you can - everything seems more out of control when you are not calm.

Talk to your husband - he needs to know that the money situation is placing more stress on you and find a way to work around it the best you can - see if there is anywhere you can cut back just for a short time.

Most importantly - keep telling yourself that you are strong and will get through this - it sucks right now but it will not be forever

In response to: not feeling good

utopiaSenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

@BlueBay.
If your psych thinks you're ready to go home, then you probably are ready.
When home, practice the techniques you have learnt in hospital. Your learning doesn't end when you leave hospital. It's just starting.
When your head is full of all these negative or scary thoughts. Focus just on one. One at a time. What can I do about it? Is my reaction realist? Is it important? How do I protect myself?
One thing at a time.

In response to: Re: not feeling good

Shaz51Senior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Hugs @BlueBay

In response to: Re: not feeling good

Faith-and-HopeSenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Has your psych talked to you about DBT @BlueBay ?

Can you raise it with him ?

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