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not feeling good

BlueBaySenior Contributor

not feeling good

At the moment i am not feeling good. i feel like my body is in 'run away mode'. i feel my body is running on a high, my head is so mixed up. i have to go to bed and try to sleep, but don't know if i can.

my hormones are everywhere at the moment; my mood is sky high negative. i can't deal with this anymre. all of a sudden i am not feeling good. i think it is anxiety.

i don't know why i feel like this; i just want to cry but can't becsue everyone is home. i am going to bed. i don't know what is going on. actually maybe it is anxiety because i felt like passing out today.

I went to my GP to have my mirena IUD taken out as I had had enough. But he couldn't find the string, so he sent me for a ultrasound. Had that and the guy said i had two fibroids and a cyst on my ovary. but he couldn't find the string either, so had to have an xray to find the metal piece. they didn't tell me anything. but while waiting i was so anxious i almost passed out.

so now i have to wait for tomorrow when my GP will call me at work and let me know what will happen now. hopefully he can take the mirena out. i don't know.

my body is reacting to my anxiety - i feel so shaky, i need to stop. no point telling anyone at home becasue (a) they won't believe me and (b) they prob wouldn't care.

sorry, i had to tell someone. i feel so alone 😞

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In response to: not feeling good

BlueBaySenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

I'm so angry. I called my doctor and asked to speak with him. Receptionist said he will call me later. Well he didn't snd niw they're closed im so angry I want to send him a message through their Facebook page. I'm not allowed but I want to. I don't care. I'm angry and he needs to know.
See the angry me wants to tell him off for not calling me back. But the real me thinks he was busy. But the angry me is taking over atm.

In response to: Re: not feeling good

Zoe7Senior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

I am here to be angry at instead @BlueBay Tell me what you want to tell him and I will listen. You know it is not going to help you if you send him an angry message - I'm here sitting on your shoulder my little yellow flower so talk away

In response to: not feeling good

BlueBaySenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

@Zoe7
Ok.
This is what I would have said to my doctor
"I called you today and left a msg and you never called back. I'm so angry because I feel abandoned yet agsin by you. I feel rejected and not cared. I feel you think I'm a pain in the arse patient and hate me. I feel sick I feel nauseous and wanted to speak with you to get some advice. You told me I could call you. But when I do you don't call back. I'm so pissed off ". You get me angry that I feel I need to Sh.
So @Zoe7 that's what I wanted to tell him.

In response to: Re: not feeling good

Zoe7Senior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Now you have got it out of your system @BlueBay can you take a step back from what you would have said and see many different reasons why he didn't get back to you - could be he didn't even get the message and therefore he didn't know you rang. I know that does not help a lot with your abandonmnet feelings but this doctor really has been there for you for some time now and keeps telling you he isn't going anywhere - and BB his actions speak louder than words - he hasn't abandoned you, and today may have just been a super busy one (there are many reasons why he didn't call back BB).

What else can you tell me - talk about that beautiful granddaughter of yours - how old is she now?

In response to: not feeling good

BlueBaySenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

@Zoe7
Beautiful Ayla is 5 months old now. She smiles she talks in her own language. She eats some veggies snd her cereal. She gives me so much love. I sing to her. I sing twinkle twinkle and she sits and listens.
I can't wait fir her to be old enough to go to the park. We have one at the end of our street.
How are you?

In response to: not feeling good

BlueBaySenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

@Zoe7
If I step back I can see those reasons why my doctor didn't call. I will call him tomorrow.

In response to: Re: not feeling good

Zoe7Senior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Proud of you BB - you just needed to be able to talk out your frustrations and then you could take that step back - wtg @BlueBay

I am ok - been a long day and very tired so taking it super easy tonight.

I can imagine you singing twinkle twinkle and little Ayla'seyes lighting up at the sound of your voice - you have something very special and very precious there with her BB and that makes me very happy for you. My nan and I had that relationship and it meant the world to me - as I am sure it will to Ayla in the future too

In response to: not feeling good

CatcakesSenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

That was a beautiful piece of therapeutic converse @BlueBay and @Zoe7... well done both of you ❤️🌿🌸💪

In response to: Re: not feeling good

Zoe7Senior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Hey @Catcakes you are back. I see you didn't end up in the 'big house' - I had the bail money all ready for you too lol Would have done it too @Catcakes

@BlueBay and I go waaaaaaay back - so it is not hard for us chat here. She helps me and I return the favour when I can

In response to: not feeling good

CatcakesSenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

You know what, @Zoe7... I behaved myself right up until I was back in my own home turf
Then I cracked it 😞
I wished I could have got through without an episode of emotional dysregulation but maybe that’s too much to expect.
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