not feeling good

I hope there is another reason @Faith-and-Hope

It's just that all the time it jhappens to me when I want to go over to her house, or I try to call and leave messages. and then she never calls back.

I sort of feel that she is on mum's side. I try to be reasonable but my head goes to negative and then catastrophises a lot.

It's a shame because we were ready today to share the good news but now it will have to wait until after Easter. I will try again to invite her family over for Easter but i can guarantee there will be a reason that she won't come.

And it hurts. And this is what my mum used to to do me all the time too. Always finding an excuse, can't come, have this to do, that to do; always a reason to not come. So how would that make me feel - crap.

Oh well, i will see what happens.

Think i will go for a walk i need to get out of the house for a while; everyone is giving me the irrates.

Chat later xxxooo

Hi @utopia

I quickly read something yesterday about your session with your psych. But now I wanted to reply and can't find it. Can you pls help me find it. i really want to write something.

Thanks BB xxoo

A walk is a great way to byrn up the negative energy that anger produces @BlueBay ..... that's a beautiful self-care choice there ,... well done ❣

I am psyching myself up to go for a short walk before church this morning, which actually involves getting out of bed first .... lol .... but I have hung a cup if coffee as a carrot in front of me at the moment ....

Let's see how that goes .....

Hi @BlueBay

I understand how you are feeling - so much happening that you would like to share with your family and your family is not available

Take some ideas from an old and tired bird - I won't give advice but I got tired and old just trying to have some contact - and when I moved into this unit - over 13 years ago - I invited my parents to see my new place - and we had a bit of an afternoon tea but it got too hot for my parents and they never came

I never asked them again - I would have asked Dad but like your Dad he couldn't seem to function very well because my mother didn't want to do this, put up with that onandonandon etc

So yeah - this is the way it is and it's horrible and upsetting and sad and I would be feeling angry if this was in my way atm - and the years have past since that day back in the past - but we can't change people and we don't need the headaches of other people

I have long given up reaching out all the time - people can have all the excuses they want - I am tired of all of it and I have given up - which is really hard so I totally get it

But I know that getting anger out is a good idea - anger pushed down inside causes or turns into depression - better to have an even level of anger for a while than just feel so miserable

Your anger has to come out - but only in useable amounts - and your sister not being able to come forwhaterreason - that's a good enough reason to be angry for a while

But not too much or too long -

Lots of hugs from up here

Dec

Hi @BlueBay

I'm glad you got rid of some of your anger and you are thinking about your new home and the new baby

Doing all of this without your interferring mother has been stressful but worth it

My eyes are starting to bother me so I have to get off line - I shouldn't watch TV either -

I will be back later -

Hugs - Dec

Glad you're okay and a bit better today @utopia, although it sounds your depression is getting you down.

I so understand what it's like when depression sets in again.

Take care my friend 🙂 xxxooo

does anyone know which moderator is on tonight. i am having SH thoughts. just chatted on line with lifeline and i lost contact with them.

@Former-Member