not feeling good

Hi @utopia @Former-Member @Zoe7 @Owlunar

I just don't get it. I have just come home later than expected from work. Had to finish something off. I have been printing shelf labels for every single item in the pharmacy. It is a nightmare 😞

So i get home and hubby and son are sitting down watching the car race!!! Daughter on her way home from work and younger son out with his girlfriend.

I asked what was for tea as I have no intention of cooking tonight. My back is sore and I am completely stuffed, physically and mentally and am ready to snap and cry any minute 😞

The answer was 'oh we don't know'. hubby doesn't know and son doesn't know. WTF.

why can't they just decide on something and cook it for me or even buy something cooked. how hard is that.

i am not cooking, i refuse tonight. i am so close to taking a few sleeping meds and gonig to bed.

thank you guys for being here for me today. i am not sure how i am going to cope tonight, but i will take sleeping tablets and see how i go,

damn i just read a post and i should't have. now i am starting to get upset about stuff and what i wrote in it. damn trigger' it's my fault. now i am crying, why did i read it.

please tell me that wasnt my post @BlueBay i seen you comment on it

maybe you could sit down and have a discussion and organise a plan with them say they cook or buy something on the days you work late? and you cook on the days your not at home late? its probably not something that will get resolved without maybe trying to address it with them....?

Its very common in our house hold too, i could get home at 7 and itll still be the same way unless mum gets up and cooks but thats still not until around 6 30 ish if not just starting when i walk throuhg the door

No @Former-Member not your post at all.

It was actually something about grief and I wrote something which now has upset me. I am so stupid, I saw the heading 'trigger warning' and I still had to read it. why do i do these stupid things to myself.

hubby has gone to the shop, but just phoned me now and is huffing and puffing. i just can't do anything right at the moment. i must be such a failure in life. 😞

would you like to talk about we, maybe we can break it down so it doesnt seem so bad?

also i get those feeling very often myself but i can tell you your far from a failure, your boys are jsut being lazy and should be kind and think oh mums not home hmm maybe we should start dinner.. @BlueBay

I don't want to trigger you or worry you though @Former-Member

It's okay i have just emailed the mods; hopefully someone will reply. Not sure @CherryBomb if you're around still.

BB

its ok @BlueBay if you want to talk about it im hear, i seem to be ok atm so i can help you, im ok talking about grief tonight if you want.

Thanks @Former-Member

It's about not seeing my parents; i am grieving the loss of not be able to see my dad. They don't talk to me and haven't for 7 yrs. It's also grieving the loss of my childhood of what happened to me as a child. i don't have any childhood phjotos, my mum refuses to give some to me. so i have nothing from my childhood; no family photos, no nothing. it's sad and is very painful to have nothing. i feel like a nobody 😞

It's grieving the loss of a close relationship with my parents. I don't want to make contact with my mum as she is controlling and manipulative but i can't see my dad because of my mum. It's difficult, it hurts so much. i could go on but for now i think i better stop. It hurts @Former-Member. think i need a hug 😞