not feeling good

I'm having a sad yucky day. Feeling sick and am laying down.
feeling very sad for the person I've become

I'm tired

it's all probably because I stopped my meds

@Faith-and-Hope @Shaz51 @Former-Member @Former-Member @Owlunar @MDT @Maggie and others following

kep going with your meds @BlueBay xx

maybe having a lay down might help

Hey @MDT

i understand what you're saying. It's just my instant negative head/thoughts go to this kind of thinking behaviour straight away.

I feel that the last 10 years has taken a toll. so much has happened over the last decade. Huge.

And in group therapy the other day there was a question raised - 'what would you be doing if you didn't have a mental health illness' - got me thinking. I still don't know the answer.

You know sometimes I don't even remember what happened prevoius to 2010. I don't know what i did on the weekends or with the kids. But then again the kids would have been teenagers, they wouldn't want to do stuff with us. Actually we did do a lot with the boys with tennis tournaments, yes I do remember that!!! Travelling all around Victoria for tournaments with another 5 families.

There is so much of my childhood that i don't remember whether its because of the trauma. even my teenage years, no recollection. Favourite toys - have none and no memory.

@MDT i better go, i am looking after A for a little bit and she is getting into things that she shouldn't be!!!

Chat again soon my friend. hope your saturday has been ok xxx

You know I've been thinking - do you lose parts of your childhood, parts of your life because of a childhood trauma or really any trauma?
I can't remember what I did as a child. I remember a sll parts here and there but not a lot. I've got friends who remember everything. They have childhood friends keto in touch. I've got none.

im struggling tonight. I feel like my head is in a thick cloud. I can't concentrate or do things properly.
@MDT @Shaz51 @Faith-and-Hope @Former-Member @Owlunar @Maggie and others following

How are you doing @BlueBay ? Just stopping by to give you some support

Hi @Jynx

Today's been a bit up and down. My head is very cloudy with self doubt and negative self talk.
I've made a doctors appt for Monday morning. I'm not feeling well. It could be because I stopped my meds.
im not sure how I'm going to cope this week with surgery and having to depend on others to do things for me. Hubby is taking week off but it could be wirse having him home.

I wish I was in hospital. 😢

ohhh @BlueBay , are you ok my sister ❤🧡💛🧡💛💚💙💜💓🤍❣

@BlueBay that does sound like a tough week - relying on others can feel disempowering, sure... or maybe think of it as "I'm having surgery which is a pretty big deal, so I'm allowing others to take care of me during this tough time"
I wish you all the best, and the forums will be here for you, that's for sure