not feeling good

hi @MDT @Shaz51 @Maggie @Former-Member @Owlunar @Gazza75 abd others following

went to pick up A this morning to come to our house. She played with jersey and after lunch we took her to the park. She fell asleep in the way hime. Now asleep in spare bed. She says she's a big girl because she sleeps in our bed.
my d is coming later to pick her up. We're making home made pizza for dinner. And watch tennis tonight. Think the Aussie's are playing.

i as thinking this morning I'm going to write out a "to do list" daily in my diary. Then I can tick off as I go.


hope you are all having an ok day. ❤️❤️❤️

Hey @MDT

I know last year you were applying for jobs. Can I ask you if it's ok? How m as by jobs were you applying for. Was it hard.
I know I'm a lot older (prob similar to your parents age) and finding it hard. Applied now three jobs in a few weeks - no luck.

how did you cope with the let downs?

Thankyou my friend @MDT xxoo

Hi @BlueBay

I am so glad you are going to hospital soon - you reallly need the time and space to sort yourself out - it will take a little time to get through all you have been through and it's amazing but you have kept going through all of this

And I have asked myself often how you manage this - but you do - and you are not a failure and why would you not deserve the help and love the forum gives you. You are a bit scatter-brained with all the pressure you have had lately and although it's something people go through you have had a load of it all at once - with one thing after another and this would be hard for anyone - you have BPD so it's harder but please give yourself credit for keeping-on-keeping-on the way you have been

It's really been something - you can't see how strong you are but from the outside looking in - yes - you are strong

Maybe it's not time to be looking for work until after you have had a break and been to hospital to sort yourself out - then you will have time available to write resumes and look for work and make a full-time job out of it - maybe it's difficult were you live and you need to look further afield - and three applications is a few weeks isn't much - with the time available you can do more than that and let downs - yes - a lot of people apply for jobs - so a lot of people are let down - which is why you need to broaden your field - in distance - time - type of work - etc - and from reading your posts all the years I know you are well qualified -

Looking for work's not easy - but it can be exciting - you don't know what might turn up - and you will be okay - I know this because you get through the worst of situations and manage it - you have done so much of that recently - you will be okay - I think the hard part is that you don't believe that but I am not the only person telling you

And looking for work is in the future - writing a to-do list each day and ticking it off is a good start - and you have plenty to do

I am thinking of you all the time - sending more hugs

Dec

Thsnkyou my friend for your support and advice @MDT

just walked for 30 min

should feel great but ...... I feel crap!!

I can't be bothered

no motivation

very teary

my mum rang to see how I went in my last day at wirk. I started to cry.

@MDT @Owlunar @Shaz51 @Maggie @Former-Member @Gazza75 abd others

@BlueBay 💙💙💙💙

You know I don't think hubby realises the impact of losing my job has on me.
I mentioned to him that tomorrow will feel different as I'm not going to wirk. His response - "it's just like a holiday"

I think he would be feeling pretty crap and anxious and stressed if he lost his job.

He's been a bit funny today. I decided to go fir my morning walk this morning. He didn't want to come. He's then been quiet all day. Nit even really playing with A. at times I've had to prompt him thst A was talking to him. He says he was listening.
niw he had to go and buy pasta for dinner but says to me I'm going fir a drive before I go to shops.