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not feeling good

BlueBaySenior Contributor

not feeling good

At the moment i am not feeling good. i feel like my body is in 'run away mode'. i feel my body is running on a high, my head is so mixed up. i have to go to bed and try to sleep, but don't know if i can.

my hormones are everywhere at the moment; my mood is sky high negative. i can't deal with this anymre. all of a sudden i am not feeling good. i think it is anxiety.

i don't know why i feel like this; i just want to cry but can't becsue everyone is home. i am going to bed. i don't know what is going on. actually maybe it is anxiety because i felt like passing out today.

I went to my GP to have my mirena IUD taken out as I had had enough. But he couldn't find the string, so he sent me for a ultrasound. Had that and the guy said i had two fibroids and a cyst on my ovary. but he couldn't find the string either, so had to have an xray to find the metal piece. they didn't tell me anything. but while waiting i was so anxious i almost passed out.

so now i have to wait for tomorrow when my GP will call me at work and let me know what will happen now. hopefully he can take the mirena out. i don't know.

my body is reacting to my anxiety - i feel so shaky, i need to stop. no point telling anyone at home becasue (a) they won't believe me and (b) they prob wouldn't care.

sorry, i had to tell someone. i feel so alone 😞

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In response to: not feeling good

BlueBaySenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

@Owlunar @MDT @Maggie @eth @Former-Member @Shaz51 @Gazza75 others following


I've had a bad day.
I went to the exercise class and I broke down after the education part. It was run by my dietitian. I think he knew I wasn't good. After the class he asked if I was going to the exercise class and I said no. He suggested I go fir a few minutes. As I got In there the guy who runs the group asked how I was. I told him not good and thst I was going hime. Not staying. He asked for a chst in private. I broke down telling him I'm all the negative words you can think of. I was broken. He listened and said he is here fir me. After 15 mins I decided I was going hime. He quickly spoke to my psychologist and she saw me fir 10 mins. She suggested I go home and stay active if I can. All I wanted to do was go home and be left alone.
I'm home outside drinking a coffee. The sun is nice and warm.
I feel like I'm never going to get better. I'm such a failure.

In response to: Re: not feeling good

MaggieSenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

You’re far from a failure @BlueBay. Recovery is a long hard and lonely journey.

It sounds like you had some positive support today, from people who care very much about you.

A sit in the sun with coffee is a good place to be. Take care where you can. ❤️💚💛

In response to: Re: not feeling good

MDTSenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

hey @BlueBay

Remember how I was going through a tough time a few months ago before I had a job?

the point is we can get past it in time. Give yourself credit for actually trying as well. Far better to be doing something and it not working out than nothing at all hey?

It may pay good divedends to give yourself some slack.

You also have a good network of supports so that counts too.

Either way we are all here for you my awesome friend

In response to: Re: not feeling good

BlueBaySenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Thanks @Maggie @MDT

I just feel so damn deflated depressed and like I couldn't care less about anything anymore

In response to: Re: not feeling good

MDTSenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Yeah I am a bit like this too @BlueBay

In response to: Re: not feeling good

BlueBaySenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Hey @MDT I'm sorry you're feeling like that too 😢

is it this time of year. Maybe??
I know I have to buy presents and food for Xmas day but don't have spare money to do it. So I bought a few things for little A - a little pool, a book and clothes. But. Need to buy fir my boys too. Might give them a voucher. It's too hard at their age. I think you're a similar age??

I'm just tired of all the crap. I'm tired of everything right now.
I think running away would be good.
idk I get so confused.
take care my friend

In response to: Re: not feeling good

MolliexSenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

You're doing so well @BlueBay. Ups and downs, it's all part of this fun MH journey. Be kind to yourself friend x

In response to: Re: not feeling good

BlueBaySenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

I don't feel I'm doing well @Molliex

@I feel like my mood has gone down very very fast

I don't care about anything atm

couldn't care less

In response to: Re: not feeling good

MDTSenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Usually my grandparents send me a card with cash @BlueBay

It's the best I find. Can be used on anything

In response to: Re: not feeling good

MDTSenior Contributor

Re: not feeling good

Plus the thought counts more @BlueBay than anything else
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