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Want to forget TW

Want to forget TW

Sometimes we can be enjoying the simplest and nicest of things and we are reminded of our past. For me that came yesterday. I was lucky enough to be attending a concert - something on it's own that would have been tricky for me in the past but it was a Christmas present and I was actually looking forward to it. It was a beautiful day and we had found a great position to set up for the day and evening. About half way through the day I had someone tap me on the shoulder - it was actually a nice surprise as it was someone I knew but had not seen in a few years. I knew his Mum - she both taught me and also was in the same sporting club many years later, and I taught his daughter. His Mum passed away a several years ago and we stayed in contact for a while afterwards. This is a person I actually like - he has been through some tough times and I think we connected on that level as well previously.

The conversation was lovely and we were all laughing together (in such a lovely way that I have not laughed for a long time) then out of the blue he brought up someone I absolutely detest. I don't know where it came from as this person is older than both of us but I suppose I should not be surprised as we all grew up in similar circles. He tried to continue the conversation but I could not help but say just how I felt about this person and could we change the subject. My sister was also there and to begin with she was going to have a go at me for being so direct but I think she then cottoned on to just how uncomfortable I was feeling and maybe knew why. This person was not one of those that had abused me for so long as a child but he was no doubt aware of it as he made my life just as impossible when he was around. I was just a kid but that did not stop the comments and implications directed towards me. I was just as scared of this person as the boys involved.

I had just the previous day spoke to my psych about leaving things in the past and then something like this happens. We had talked about what I do when triggered but this was an exception circumstance. I cannot generally hide the pain when it is so bad - I felt so sick at the time. I know my sister picked up on it but my old acquaintance was drinking a bit so really did not ...I am actually grateful for that.

Last night was a really hard night once I got home. To make it worse - I have been sick today and had to come home even before the day started at work - so there have been a lot of tears, a lot of sleeping and a lot of thoughts swimming around. I am having tomorrow off as well - whether I am well enough to be there or not physically, I know I am mentally not. This has been a massive hit and I can feel the effects both physically and mentally. I know it will pass in time but I feel that so much has been happening over the last year or so that my cup is empty.

From here I am unsure 'where to next'. I can feel the world closing in around me - yesterday is probably a culmination of so different emotions, so much grief, so much loss and so much to keep wading through. The beginning of this was 2 weeks ago when I saw a new pdoc and had to go through so much in such a small space of time. I felt okay in the moment doing so but it is always afterwards that it hits. My psych acknowledged this and just how hard it would have been ...I went straight back to work after the pdoc appointment and my psych has no idea how I had gotten the strength to do so - I don't either because it was incredibly hard ...but like most things - I push it away and try not to deal with it ...the result is I am where I am now - triggered massively by what happened yesterday, finding my head all over the place and wondering how I am going to find that place I was once at. ...it will be okay but a little extra support right now would help.

248 replies

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In response to: Want to forget TW

Re: Want to forget TW

Always here when I can be @Zoe7

I have things to do now and must have some breakfast -

There is plenty of love - love is one of those things that there is more of the more we use it

Concussion takes a little time to recover - a headache goes with the territory -

You will be in my thoughts today

Mumma Bear

Owlunar

In response to: Re: Want to forget TW

Re: Want to forget TW

Was feeling a little better until I had to get up and go out @Owlunar I have been to the chemist though and picked up Clover from the vet so I have a few hours before I have to take Toby back also. The whole staff there were very concerned as I called from hospital yesterday to cancel Toby's appointment then my sister also called to do the same (I did not know that until later). So it seems everyone knew why I had to cancel yesterday but it does also show what wonderful people we do have in this world. It is not the first time I have seen such care and compassion from the people at my vet clinic but further re-enforces just how lovely they all are.

Thankfully, for the moment, the banging next door has stopped so I am going to take advantage of that and lay down while I can. Will let you know how Toby goes later if I am able to.

In response to: Re: Want to forget TW

Re: Want to forget TW

Hi @Zoe7

I have been working down the list - and finally found you - I'm glad I did.

That headache might be around for a short while - I hope it's not long - I had a slight concussion last year - my nose v. a taxi door when I was getting in - not what I intended of course - so I get it - skull v. skull would be harder - in both senses of the word - ouch.

I'm glad the banging stopped - you didn't need that right then - it does happen though - mm - I'm sorry that had to happen right then

The people at the vet sound wonderful - I have found vets splendid people - it's great to have that support. I hope you little family is okay with all this happening to them - both at the same time - and you have a bad headache - and don't feel well yourself -

I am sending my best love and care - and know you Dad is having a procedure day after tomorrow - your plate is full - it's not easy and you are much loved

Best wishes

Mumma Bear

Owlunar

In response to: Re: Want to forget TW

Re: Want to forget TW

Will not be able to see Dad before tomorrow @Owlunar but will call him today. Still have a headache on and off so more rest today.

In response to: Re: Want to forget TW

Re: Want to forget TW

Hi @Zoe7

Yes - this is a time for you to take it easy - science about head injuries has gone ahead in leaps and bounds. It will take time and it's great you are keeping calm.

I will be thinking about your Dad too - both of you truly

And your little furkids - I hope they are getting better.

All my best wishes

Mumma Bear

Owlunar

In response to: Re: Want to forget TW

Re: Want to forget TW

Dad is in ICU now @Owlunar but I spoke to him today and he is doing a little better (as far as he can be anyway). Hopefully tomorrow's surgery will help a lot and he can recover quickly.

I still have a headache and some nausea on and off but have been resting all day. My fur babies have kept me warm LOL They are super snuggly at the moment - animals have such a wonderful sense of when things are not quite right.

Going to go to work tomorrow - more so the kids can see I am okay. No doubt they will wrap me in cotton wool (and give lots of hugs) but I am going to make it an easy day for us all.

In response to: Re: Want to forget TW

Re: Want to forget TW

Hi @Zoe7

I have been thinking about you and your Dad all day - yes - I know you most likely don't feel like posting and there is no need to comply - just take you time and let your emotions flow around as they will - you have had a rough week.

You were going to school today - to give the kids an easy day and let them see you are okay - I hope that went well -

Again - my best thoughts and a big but gentle hug from

Mumma Bear

Owlunar

In response to: Re: Want to forget TW

Re: Want to forget TW

Dad is on his way home @Owlunar but I don't think he should be - he should still be in hospital. I picked him up and brought him to my place to wait for Mum to pick him up. She wanted to get an ambulance so I don't know how they are going to cope at home together. I really can't think about that now though - I need rest myself as I have been out 4 times today. I had my psych appointment this morning then in to visit Dad (but had to go back as it was not visiting hours -was told the wrong time 😔). Then back to pick Dad up. I am exhausted and have a headache. I made the mistake of letting my Mum know and she 'told' me to get it seen to - when all I need is rest and not to be running around everywhere. So that is what I am going to do now - rest.

In response to: Re: Want to forget TW

Re: Want to forget TW

HI @Zoe7

Yes - you need to rest - you have had it seen to and all this running around makes it harder to recover.

I've been doing the same thing - needing to take it easy with my shoulder but running around getting my burn dressed - it's recovering now - all of this takes time and energy we don't always have.

Your Dad had a procedure yesterday and they set him free today with your mother not well either - I guess if they felt they couldn't cope they could have asked for another day - still - hospitals - I understand - they would want to go home

You won't stop wondering though - and feeling the stress of all of this - and I really get it - one thing at a time is enough - but we have these things happen.

Sending best thoughts as always

Mumma Bear

Owlunar

In response to: Re: Want to forget TW

Re: Want to forget TW

I haven't heard from Mum or Dad so they must be okay @Owlunar I will give them a call soon to see how they are.

I need to spend some time today setting up my new laptop - I needed a new one as I have rebuilt my present one a couple of times but now it would be throwing away money to fix the present issues. I will keep it for watching things but for all other work I need one that performs better.

Not feeling great myself so I will just be doing what I need to today and getting rest in between also.

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