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I decided to start a new thread, my new chapter in my life is going to focus on healing my traumas, building resilience and self-worth and taking the steps of achieving mood stability. I am praying this year will be better than the last. Last year the SI got really intense, was so close to losing hope and I felt like my heart was breaking into a million pieces like shattered glass. It all still feels overwhelming, I have a long way to go on my healing journey, but I think I'm starting to feel a bit more hopeful about the future.
In response to: Piecing the shattered glass together
creative_writerSenior Contributor
Re: Piecing the shattered glass together
@tyme, I’m just infuriated at myself. I feel like I’m the problem. I feel if my MH is getting worse, it’s because of me. It’s because I’m too lazy, not trying hard enough. If my hands are more swollen, it’s because of my inability to manage stress properly, so my body just becomes more inflamed because of me. I have everything, I have professional supports, I go to therapy, I take meds, what more do I need?
In response to: Re: Piecing the shattered glass together
tymeModerator
Re: Piecing the shattered glass together
What therapies do you engage in now @creative_writer ? Or do you mean counselling or something?
In response to: Re: Piecing the shattered glass together
creative_writerSenior Contributor
Re: Piecing the shattered glass together
@tyme, I’ve done CBT, schema, EMDR in the past. Therapy has helped. So have meds. My concern is that recently I’ve noticed myself experiencing more SI and feeling confused why. I just thought maybe it was my fault things are getting out of hand, like I am doing something wrong now. Maybe it’s all in my head, I’m making it worse?
In response to: Re: Piecing the shattered glass together
tymeModerator
Re: Piecing the shattered glass together
Perhaps this is why it's good to have professional opinions in case there IS something you are doing which is not helping. @creative_writer . However, you know what is working and not working for you. It's about giving things a go and being ready for changes.
In response to: Re: Piecing the shattered glass together
creative_writerSenior Contributor
Re: Piecing the shattered glass together
@tyme, I don’t even know what’s wrong with me. I was thinking about what I could do to myself tomorrow. I won’t be missed. I’m sorry.
In response to: Re: Piecing the shattered glass together
tymeModerator
Re: Piecing the shattered glass together
Would you consider contacting someone to speak to right now? @creative_writer
In response to: Re: Piecing the shattered glass together
creative_writerSenior Contributor
Re: Piecing the shattered glass together
@tyme, I’ve taken my night meds, so hoping to doze off soon. Can’t do anything right now because I have family around too, so I’m safe for tonight. I can contact someone tom morning if I need to. I also have a pdoc appointment in the afternoon too. Goodnight 🫂♥️
In response to: Re: Piecing the shattered glass together
tymeModerator
Re: Piecing the shattered glass together
Good night @creative_writer . Please take care.
In response to: Re: Piecing the shattered glass together
creative_writerSenior Contributor
Re: Piecing the shattered glass together
The world has been so cold to me lately……
In response to: Re: Piecing the shattered glass together
FloatingFeatherSenior Contributor
Re: Piecing the shattered glass together
It sounds like things have been particularly hard for you lately @creative_writer. I really hope the universe takes it easy on you from now on and things really start to pick up for you very soon.
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