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Something’s not right

Piecing the shattered glass together

creative_writerSenior Contributor02 Feb 2023, 8:35 pm AEDT

Piecing the shattered glass together

I decided to start a new thread, my new chapter in my life is going to focus on healing my traumas, building resilience and self-worth and taking the steps of achieving mood stability. I am praying this year will be better than the last. Last year the SI got really intense, was so close to losing hope and I felt like my heart was breaking into a million pieces like shattered glass. It all still feels overwhelming, I have a long way to go on my healing journey, but I think I'm starting to feel a bit more hopeful about the future.

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In response to: Piecing the shattered glass together

tymeModerator05 Mar 2023, 9:18 pm AEDT

Re: Piecing the shattered glass together

I hear these thoughts are so real and painful right now @creative_writer .

TW: A very direct post/trauma - read only if you are ready

Content/trigger warning

But...

Are they helpful?

Are they helping you to heal?

Do they hold truth in them?

Is this what you want to be thinking for the rest of your life?

The ball is now in your court. Recovery is an active process. I hear it is hard. I hear it is painful. Yet how helpful is it in allowing these thoughts to dominate and take over your life? Painful things have happened in the past. And it is probably their joy to continue seeing you in pain. Will you give them this pleasure?

But... Are they helpful? Are they helping you to heal? Do they hold truth in them? Is this what you want to be thinking for the rest of your life? The ball is now in your court. Recovery is an active process. I hear it is hard. I hear it is painful. Yet how helpful is it in allowing these thoughts to dominate and take over your life? Painful things have happened in the past. And it is probably their joy to continue seeing you in pain. Will you give them this pleasure?

Hugs to you @creative_writer

In response to: Re: Piecing the shattered glass together

creative_writerSenior Contributor05 Mar 2023, 9:47 pm AEDT

Re: Piecing the shattered glass together

@tyme 😫. I want it to stop.

In response to: Re: Piecing the shattered glass together

tymeModerator05 Mar 2023, 10:00 pm AEDT

Re: Piecing the shattered glass together

I'm hearing that @creative_writer . Yet I'm also hearing that you want to stop thinking about the very thing you are thinking. And the more you want to stop thinking about it, the more you think about it, right?

Hence, the matter is not to stop thinking about it. Let yourself think whatever, but then learn to guide those thoughts to become more helpful thoughts. Maybe this is the work that you can do with a therapist? So it's not the absence of the thoughts, but helpful ways to cope with the thoughts.

I know you can do it.

In response to: Re: Piecing the shattered glass together

creative_writerSenior Contributor05 Mar 2023, 10:06 pm AEDT

Re: Piecing the shattered glass together

@tyme, I need to learn with time in order to be a social worker. Social workers hear confronting things all the time. I guess I just had high expectations of myself in terms of having my shit together.

In response to: Re: Piecing the shattered glass together

creative_writerSenior Contributor06 Mar 2023, 12:38 pm AEDT

Re: Piecing the shattered glass together

I'm struggling 😞 , just when I thought I was getting better, I got triggered from uni.

In response to: Re: Piecing the shattered glass together

Kyle1Senior Contributor06 Mar 2023, 1:06 pm AEDT

Re: Piecing the shattered glass together

@creative_writer Would you like to talk about it? ...

In response to: Re: Piecing the shattered glass together

creative_writerSenior Contributor06 Mar 2023, 1:32 pm AEDT

Re: Piecing the shattered glass together

@Kyle1, I don't know what to say. I just want it to stop hurting so much and want to feel worthy.

In response to: Re: Piecing the shattered glass together

Kyle1Senior Contributor06 Mar 2023, 1:33 pm AEDT

Re: Piecing the shattered glass together

@creative_writer

So, what was the trigger today at uni?

In response to: Re: Piecing the shattered glass together

creative_writerSenior Contributor06 Mar 2023, 1:54 pm AEDT

Re: Piecing the shattered glass together

@Kyle1, I've found some of the content from uni triggering. I went through an elearning module yesterday and tried spacing it out a bit, it was still a bit distressing learning about how common my type of trauma was among women. I was also really caught off guard on Thursday during a lecture from a case study that was really explicit. I sort of feel ashamed of not being able to manage things because as a social worker, I will need to be able to self-regulate my emotions when exposed to triggers.

In response to: Re: Piecing the shattered glass together

Kyle1Senior Contributor06 Mar 2023, 2:05 pm AEDT

Re: Piecing the shattered glass together

Yes. And you'll need to learn how to prevent transference happening, also, at some point...

Sorry to hear about that @creative_writer

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SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.

SANE values diversity. We are committed to providing a safe, culturally appropriate, and inclusive service for all people, regardless of their ethnicity, faith, disability, sexuality, or gender identity.