Not Coping

Confronting as they may consider it a criticism that you said they dismissed you @Birdofparadise8 ?

As I said, if you feel comfortable with sharing it with him, you know best. Hence this is something for you to decide on.

Well, he might, but I think he would prefer me to tell him how I feel he has dismissed me than not @tyme

I guess that would be his issue to work through. He was dismissive, and I can't change how I feel.

I wouldn't leave crying for no reason.

@Birdofparadise8 is he saying that your depression is from the repression of emotions?

Honestly if it were me and I felt dismissed I would need to discuss it with him too. You mentioned that you apologised for the things you did, what do you mean by that sweetie?

I'm a bit surprised that you've had this reaction given he's been seeing you for a while and he knows how you react to situations like that.

Has he responded to you?

Yes, it seems to be a leading topic at the moment. He has been talking about it for weeks. He says that when I repress how I am feeling, it leads to depression, as in repression.

Oh, I was sorry if I didn't make things clear enough to tell him how intense things have been.

Well, I don't think he knows anything that has happened. It was literally right at the end, and I smiled and said bye.

No, I haven't sent it yet. @ENKELI

@Birdofparadise8 I read what you want to send and I want you to do what you feel is best. If you think it's best to send it, I support you. Or if you think it would be better to sleep on it again I support you.

Just remember that he is being paid to help you, he has an obligation to do the very best he can for you.

You also need to make sure you don't attach to him, which can happen when you develop a relationship with someone who you talk to regularly about deep feelings.

I only have your side of things and I'm going to defend and support you so I am going to be a little biased 🥰

I want to see you develop into a happy person and wish I could do more for you ❤️

I will send it. I am double-checking for errors and if it sounds okay.

Yeah, well, after today, I am unsure. He has made me cry a number of times now.

Oh no, I don't think I am attached to him.

Thank you enkeli I really appreciate you saying that.

I just hope I haven't overreacted and made a bit issue out of nothing. @ENKELI

@Birdofparadise8 glad to hear you don't feel attached, that is really good.

Hopefully he will respond in a positive way to your email

Well, I don't think so. I wouldn't know how to tell to be honest.

Yeah well I hope so or I will be stewing on it until i see him next week. @ENKELI

@Birdofparadise8 I think you'd know if you had an unhealthy attachment to him - you are fully aware your relationship with him is purely a client - psych one. He is helping you because he's paid to.

We here at Sane who spend time with you do it because we care about you, not because we have an obligation to. Does that make sense? I feel an attachment to you that I wouldn't a psychologist for example.

That's how you know you're not attached to him.

My humble opinion is that he needs to know you left feeling bad. You're paying him to help you feel better and of you're leaving in a bad state he's not doing his job.

Again this is only my thought but I think I understand your need to contact him xoxo

Thank you for clarifying that makes much more sense.

Yes, I see him as my psych and nothing more. Yes, I have had times where I feel like I have been waiting to see him, but I don't think I break the bounds by emailing him as he said I could, and I don't think I am abusing that. As I see him weekly, it wouldn't happen more than once a week, maybe a special occasion twice if I have sent him something, say yesterday, to discuss today, but then today has happened, so then it would be two emails.

Yes, he is paid to care, lol.

Oh yes, we have a very special relationship, not one you would pay for, lol.

I feel this has happened way too many times.

I'm not sure if you know, but I was so hurt running across the road and going to cry. I shouldn't feel like that. Like you said, he is there to help me feel better. I'm not paying him to upset me.

I was crying while writing the email. I am still sensitive now and trying not to cry about it.

I feel like I must be too sensitive for this to happen. Maybe I'm just making a big deal about all this. Ahh, sorry. My brain is like a jumbled mess right now. @ENKELI

Thank you for being so kind. I really appreciate it. I appreciate you as well. I have even fewer friends now with my guy friend. I texted him last night about how I felt, and he read the text but still has not replied. I am so hurt by him. I really cared about him and thought we had a good relationship, but obviously not. He doesn't like me. I feel like I keep doing so many things wrong. I'm such a failure, and nothing is going my way at the moment. I sometimes wish I was like a robot and so I wouldn't feel sad, dismissed, hurt, etc.