Not Coping

Ah okay @ENKELI

Let's hope you can find someone.

I'm back now long KHL session.

@Birdofparadise8 how was the session? Did it help?

What did you have for dinner @ENKELI 🙂

@Shaz51 I'm still deciding! Probably nachos. Something easy. Tomorrow is going to be my day in the kitchen when I'll do some baking and cook meals for the week.

It was good. We talked about my aunt and uncle and how they don't message me because I told her about the conversation I had with my uncle, which is below. He only replied back to something from a few days ago I emailed him,

Him "Looking at your invoice, doesn’t the black and white one say that you’re $92 in credit? Therefore you don’t owe them money? Looking at your invoice, doesn’t the black and white one say that you’re $92 in credit? Therefore you don’t owe them money"?

Me "Maybe I don't know why. I have only paid for this month. Maybe I don't know why. I have only paid for this month".

Me "Do you have a busy week ahead? Do you have a busy week ahead"?

Him "Yeah it will be. Lots on at work ATM Yeah it will be. Lots on at work ATM"

Me "Ah okay. Did you get either of the jobs? Ah okay. Did you get either of the jobs"?

Him "Still waiting to hear back on it all. It probably be at least another week though. Still waiting to hear back on it all. It probably be at least another week though".

Me "Ah, okay, fingers crossed for you. Ah, okay, fingers crossed for you".

Then, the conversation ended. I took an interest in his life and stuff, but he didn't even ask how I was or what I was doing this week. To be honest, it really upset me.

Anyway, with my regular, we discussed not putting expectations on them with the texting because they might now be in a place where they need that, but I do. Putting that expectation up leads me to feel sad, alone, and rejected.

We talked about ACT, and she thinks that will be helpful for me I did some Google and my psych uses it, and it looked interesting so I'll ask him about that.

We talked about my SI.

We discussed that when I feel sad, I should try and be mindful and do a meditation and see if that helps and to not be so ridged when it comes to how I'm feeling.

I think it was a very good session. @ENKELI

I'll reply with the TS next.

Sorry I couldn't pick only one from each. It was hard to just pick just these. @ENKELI

Breath - Fearless

Your not sorry - Fearless

Mr Perfectly Fine - Fearless

Sparks Fly - Speak Now

Mean - Speak Now

Enchanted - Speak Now

All Too Well - Red

Safe & Sound - Red

The Very First Night - Red

22 - Red

Wildest Dream - 1998

Welcome To New York - 1989

Blank Space - 1989

Style - 1989

Bad Blood - 1989

Say Don’t Go - 1989

Red For It - Reputation

Don’t Blame Me - Reputation

I Did Something Bad - Reputation

Delicate - Reputation

Dress - Reputation

Cruel Summer - Lover

The Man - Lover

Archer - Lover

Miss Americana & The Heartbreak Prince - Lover

It’s Nice To Have A Friend - Lover

Cardigan - Folklore

Exile - Folklore

Mirrorball - Folklore

Willow - Evermore

Champagne Problems - Evermore

Tis the damn season - Evermore

Majorie - Evermore

Lavender Haze - Midnight

Anti-Hero - Midnight

Vigilant Shift - Midnight

Bejewelled - Midnight

Karam - Midnight

Mastermind - Midnight

The Great War - Midnight

Hi @tyme

Are you on here today?

How are you?

@Birdofparadise8 I had to google ACT but I'm glad I did as it sounds like a really helpful technique and one I am going to try.

Does your uncle normally take an interest in your life? It's hard when you don't get the validation you need, I struggle with it a lot.

When I am in a good place it doesn't upset as much but if I am in a bad place then I dwell on it and over think why the person hasn't responded or asked about me.
Again I have spent many many years with parents who are self involved and rarely ask how I am. My dad in particular never asks but will spend an hour telling me about how he is. I make sure I don't call him when I am feeling down as he only makes it worse.
Maybe ACT will help, I am definitely going to check into it.

Sorry for the delay, it's dinner time here 😉

All good. I thought it might be @ENKELI

He does when we catch up. I told them I had a job interview today, but they haven't texted to ask how it went.

Do you think it's fair for me to feel upset that he didn't continue the conversation? I was more than happy to keep talking, but he never replied to my last text.

Yeah, that would be hard with your dad.

Yes, I think it might help. I'm going to ask my psych on Wednesday.

@Birdofparadise8

I like most of the songs on Fearless. I think I wore the CD out in my car when I first got it.

Most of what you like I do too, I also like Red, Cornelia St and I Can See You. I have a mix of TS on a USB drive that I play in my car, along with the other musicians and bands I play.

I'm off to have dinner now, if I don't hear from you (I know it's after 10 there) I'll catch you again soon x