Not Coping

Hi @RiverSeal

I had a lovely day with the new girls I've met through the brunch thing. We went to the botanical gardens in the city, which was lovely. It was a bit hot, but in the shade, it was nice.

I've come home, and now I want to cry, which I don't understand why after having a good day. What's the point of doing things if I'm just going to feel like shit after, anyways.

It has been a lovely but hot day for the gardens and I'm so pleased you had a good time with the girls @Birdofparadise8!

Are you having any thoughts that are causing you to be upset that we can explore together?

You are so brave and committed to increasing your social circle and it's so heartwarming to see your wins and share the moments in your life. Socialising can be really challenging and cause all sorts of emotions and reactions when we have been isolated and felt so alone for a long time.

RiverSeal ❤️

Not really. I'm just crying, and I don't know why. I wish it would stop. I just want to have one day where I'm not like this @RiverSeal

Ok, maybe it's an opportunity to acknowledge how you are feeling and sit with the thoughts and emotions. We can reflect on it once it has passed and plan for the future when/if the situation and feelings come back again @Birdofparadise8.

Did you have any good conversations with the girls today? What was your favourite part of the day out?

I love the gardens where abouts did you make camp?

RiverSeal 🙂

Yeah, we mostly played some games, but I can't remember the name of it, and we walked around most of the garden, so I'm not sure where we were, lol.

I don't want to sit with it, though. I want these feelings to go away. It's been happening all the time lately, and I've had enough. I don't know why I've gone so far down the hill in such a short time. I just don't want to get worse. @RiverSeal

I can understand that you don't want to sit with it rn and it is really challenging to do when you just don't want to feel like this. Thank you for the trigger warning @Birdofparadise8, I just want to ask you some questions privately so I'm going to send you an email. Please keep an eye on your inbox and it will come in a few minutes. RiverSeal

Yes, it's not that good @RiverSeal

Oh, okay, I'm sorry. I am safe.

Thank you for letting me know you are safe @Birdofparadise8. Do you still have your regular KHL counsellor? I feel I remember there were some changes with that, but I could be wrong. I was so emotional for such a long time, and I know how hard it is when these feelings just pop up. What has worked in the past that we could do rn?

We have plenty of time to chat about it so please stay connected with me if you feel it is beneficial for you.

RiverSeal

Yeah, I do. She said we could talk if I needed to today, but I'll wait for her reply to my email. I will talk to her on Monday if I don't talk to her today.

Not much helps. I've got Young Sheldon on in the background to try and distract myself. I feel if I don't think about how I feel, it will go further down, and then I won't start to cry. @RiverSeal

Ok, that's good you might connect with her today or Monday @Birdofparadise8.

Distraction is a great coping technique and TV's a good option. What about your plans for tonight? What are you doing for dinner? I just ate some chilli beef I cooked the other day and it's so spicy 🌶️ love it!!

RiverSeal