Not Coping

@Birdofparadise8 it's a saying, it's like, if you don't at least give it a try, you'll never know if you could have gotten what you wanted.

oh that's so hectic. Have you considered making a complaint? You don't deserve to be treated unfairly and end up wasting so much time without getting the support you deserve.

Aww hun, please do look after yourself. Are you worried about your safety at all? Have you spoken to KHL at all tonight?

Oh okay @Jynx

I definitely didn't get what I wanted.

I don't even want to talk to him again. I just need to find someone that can help me.

I've wasted the past six months for him.

I don't know, I think I'll be fine. No, my regular isn't on tonight. We are going to have a session tomorrow, though, so I hope I can hang in till then. If I feel worse I'll give them a call and talk to someone else.

@Birdofparadise8 Can be super painful to have something like this happen and feel so let down. I guess it will just have to be a learning experience.

I reckon you can hang on, I believe in you! And sending you a pile of strength and hugs to keep ya warm till then. Hope it doesn't get so heavy you do have to call, but am glad that you've got that as a lil plan to hold on to tonight 💜

A learning experience of someone not caring at all and made me wait forever to say that @Jynx

I'm trying my best while sobbing.

Maybe you could see it like, sometimes people will let you down, but it doesn't reflect on your value as a person, and you walk away from it stronger and more resilient knowing you have the power to keep moving forward @Birdofparadise8 - to keep trying your best.

Maybe a cuppa would be good? I'll pop the kettle on for ya 💜☕

Who knows? I'm just over all this @Jynx

Mm can be rough having to continue holding on @Birdofparadise8. Tell me about something you've been enjoying lately?

The moment I read that, my mind when straight to dying @Jynx

I'm so screwed in the brain. More wanting to die but anyway. I don't even enjoy it, so I don't know why I would think that.

Just uni, work and life stuff. I went for a bike ride yesterday and did my longest distance in the shortest amount of time.

@Birdofparadise8 ever heard the phrase, 'Neurons that fire together, wire together'?

Basically, the more we think or do certain things, the stronger the neural connection is. It's where we end up with what CBT calls 'negative automatic thoughts'. It makes sense that since your mind has been going to that place so frequently, it now goes there automatically when certain things prompt that neural connection. It doesn't mean you're screwed in the brain - especially because our brains are flexible. Even if we've got strong neural connections between certain things, it is very possible to change those connections over time. If you keep working at it, eventually those thoughts will become fewer and further between.

Oh congrats! Sounds like riding is really awesome for you 😊 I hope you get to ride in nice parks and other kinds of green places. Connecting to nature is good for the soul 🌿💜

No, I don't think so @Jynx

Right okay. I'm trying, but it's not going too well. I just hate myself for thinking that.

Thank you, it was hard but good.

Let's hope tomorrow is better.

I'm still waiting for KHL. I just want to give up it's been so long.