Love. Hard to break down walls

It is @utopia. I have just the last part on a beautiful picture. The il take care of me for you if you take care of you for you. I found it powerful when I read it too.

Hi @utopia,

thanks for starting this discussion. Hi to @Former-Member, @Former-Member, @Appleblossom, @Faith-and-Hope, also.

@utopia, I know it's so difficult to open yourself up to the idea of love and allowing yourself to be vulnerable. I found it very scary too, but I never gave up hope.

I guess the thing is to recognise that everyone is vulnerable to some degree, including the men you decide to date. And you are already vulnerable in the relationships that you already maintain;- friendships, family relations, even confidants at work or in vulunteer groups or whatever you have.

To be alive and breathing is to be emotionally vulnerable! There is no escaping it and we are all in the same boat.

When I met my now husband, it was terrifying because it brought up all my anxieties. The only thing worse than feeling anxious about getting close to him, was feeling anxious about the prospect of being alone forever! Both options were scary. However, as things progressed and nothing went wrong between us, I was gradually able to relax and enjoy getting to know him.

Take your time. Get to know someone gradually. Think about their character, their personality and their values. See how they treat other people who are close to them. Note how they talk to you about other people. Are they kind-hearted?

Looks and a sense of humor are what most women are attracted by... but these things are kind of superficial. I always say that if you want a good laugh, then go see a comedy movie. Don't rely on a partner to entertain you. Love is not entertainment. It is not a pleasant distraction from life... it is not a crutch.

But love does make your life richer and more well-rounded.