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Something’s not right

Struggling: TW suicide

Struggling: TW suicide

I have been struggling a lot lately with suicidal thoughts. It’s become a daily occurrence and it’s been really overwhelming to cope. I am safe right but having to fight this is very exhausting. I feel so trapped, I am tired of living in pain, fear and shame. I feel like a burden to people and unimportant.

1711 replies

1,221 - 1,230 of 1,711

In response to: Struggling: TW suicide

Re: Struggling: TW suicide

@Eve7 I slept okay. My heart is crying but I think I’m able to sit with it. I’m learning to comfort myself because I have myself right now. I don’t do Christmas, so today has been more or less a similar day to other days.

In response to: Re: Struggling: TW suicide

Re: Struggling: TW suicide

Sitting with you @creative_writer

💚❤️💚

In response to: Re: Struggling: TW suicide

Re: Struggling: TW suicide

@Eve7 I wish I had someone to lean into and could let go 😔. It’s hard to keep these tears from falling.

❤️❤️❤️

In response to: Re: Struggling: TW suicide

Re: Struggling: TW suicide

I’m sorry you have no one with you @creative_writer

💚❤️🤗🤗❤️💚

In response to: Re: Struggling: TW suicide

Re: Struggling: TW suicide

@Eve7 I feel so ashamed and guilty. I am ashamed of past SA. I am ashamed of talking about it because I feel like I’m not meant to. And I feel like I’ve made realisations a while back, that are still not sitting with me well.

❤️❤️❤️🤗🤗

In response to: Re: Struggling: TW suicide

Re: Struggling: TW suicide

I hear you @creative_writer and it is very hard to sit with shame but please remind yourself that you were not the perpetrator and it’s not your shame to carry.

Here with you tonight 💚🤗💚

In response to: Re: Struggling: TW suicide

Re: Struggling: TW suicide

@Eve7 it’s hard. I guess sometimes healing can hurt. Therapy can bring up emotions. I’ll talk to my psych when she is back from her leave. I’ll be having appointments with a counsellor meanwhile, but the counsellor doesn’t know my trauma history. I feel so vulnerable right now, and keep needing to contact helplines, I don’t know if I’m becoming too reliant. It feel uncomfortable being reliant when one grows up independent.

❤️🤗

In response to: Re: Struggling: TW suicide

Re: Struggling: TW suicide

I can understand that feeling too @creative_writer as I often feel I’m becoming too reliant and need to use more strategies myself but if the help is available it’s good to use it.

In response to: Re: Struggling: TW suicide

Re: Struggling: TW suicide

@Eve7 I do feel like I lack personal supports. It’s not that my family doesn’t care, I just can’t talk to them. And my friends live too far. I feel like I do most of my socialisation outside of my family on here and with helplines.

In response to: Re: Struggling: TW suicide

Re: Struggling: TW suicide

That’s hard @creative_writer but I think you’ll find there’s a lot of people in the forums who could say the same. We realise that, in this safe place, there are those who truly get it.

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