I can’t cope

I managed to calm down and I slept well @Snowie. Still homesick but that’s ok. I took myself for a walk to the beach this morning on my own which is a big deal to me. It’s the first time on my own. But I realised I’m going to miss my walks and walking through the water.

Glad you were able to get a good nights sleep @Captain24

I think home sickness is just part of it. I know I missed my family and my dog! I just had to keep reminding myself that I was in there to get better, which would also help my family too.

Well done for going to the beach by yourself this morning hon. Such a big but important step for you. Once again something you can be proud of.

Thanks @Snowie. I just keep surprising myself.

We did anger management in group today and I said I had a severe anger problem. One of the girls questioned me. She said I was so nice, gentle and placid. I laughed and said yeah I am but don’t press my buttons cause I go straight from zero to 100! She said that you can’t tell. It was quite an interesting group but it did trigger my anger.. I said to the facilitator for the second group that it triggered and I may need to go for a walk to calm down. I just wanted to give her the heads up. But I calmed it down. It was funny as we were talking about problem solving and if you can’t solve a problem do you feel like a failure. What do you think after that. I said still a failure.

The girl from previously said I had surprised her again as she didn’t pick it. Needless to say she is only new! She doesn’t know me very well! 😜 That’s how much I’ve changed. New people can’t see what I was like.

I had a few others that tell me I look really good and so much better. One girl was talking to me and we were laughing and she said my laugh is infectious! It all makes me feel good about myself.

I know I keep raving on about it but I just feel so different.

@Captain24 You are proving each and every day that you can do this.

I wish I could hear your laugh hon, I will just have to imagine it!

Rave as much as you want. You deserve to. You have shown so much growth in such a short amount of time. Be proud of the person you are.

 I went bushwalking @Jynx

oooh lush @Captain24 a lil creek!! Glad you're able to spend some time in nature! No leeches, I hope?

No there wasn’t any leeches @Jynx. It’s a rainforest though. There is ferns and stuff everywhere. I had to take the photo of the creek for you. I stopped to take the photo and the girl I was with said it’s pretty isn’t it. I said that I had someone I was taking it for. See so while you’ve been away I was thinking of you

@Captain24 aww you're so sweet! I wish I'd taken more photos of the doof! I always forget haha. But here's a couple of piccies! First three are some cool UV art installations, and last one is of this sweet cactus garden they put in - made me think of my forums fam and how cool it would be if we had a zen garden together!!

Wow!!!! @Jynx They’re so so cool. Are they the lights you helped with?

A zen garden sounds good but anything I try grow dies!

@Captain24 not those ones haha I did stage lights. Like I said, I took no photos! But once the official photos go up I can have a looksie.

Hahaha I feeeeeel that! I am still constantly surprised I've managed to keep my one (1) houseplant alive! I also have heaps of succulents, mainly cos they're ultra low-maintenance and I can ignore them for months and they're mostly fine. I've killed a lot of them tho 😅

We can put you in charge of the sand box and rock arrangements, how does that sound?