I can’t cope

Hey there @Captain24

I just wanted to check in on you today and see how you are?

Sending you hugs and I'm here to chat if you need ❤️

Hi @amber22 @Snowie.

They let me out a 4 this morning on the condition that I attend my CM appointment.

Im sitting here waiting for her.

I am terrified.

I feel sick

Hi @Captain24

I know it is hard but just try and be as honest as you can with your CM. They are thee to help you. Be gentle with yourself, you are doing the very best you can 💕

Hey @Captain24

Thank you so much for updating me, you're not alone through this at all, I'm here with you every step of the way.

I really hope that talking to your CM helps you this morning.

Sitting with you

Hey @amber22 @Snowie.

I was reasonably honest with her. I did tell her exactly how I’m feeling. She is concerned about my wellbeing, as is my dietitian.

She asked me if I wanted her to take it out of my hands and I responded with I done know. We have agreed to a planned admission in March if she can get me in around the dates I’ve booked off work. I have an appointment to se the psychiatrist in 4 weeks.

I have to see her again on Friday. She has given me tonight off work since I haven’t slept. I also have to take tomorrow night off to help mum tomorrow. At least I’m not a danger to anyone at work for the next few days.

She was concerned about my safety but I assured her I would stay safe. If I don’t feel it she wants me to go to the hospital immediately.

I am so tired. I am physically and mentally exhausted. Last night scared me so much. It drained me. I was alone and had no one. I feel so sick that it has come to this.

I don’t think I have ever felt this alone. I have no one I can go to.

I am so broken inside. I feel like my whole world is crashing down on me.

I wish it could be over.

Thank you so much for updating me on how your CM appointment went @Captain24

She sounds really supportive of you and like she really does want the best for you. I can totally imagine how exhausted you would be after getting no sleep so I think it's really good that you don't have to go into work this evening.

Do you think you will be able to sleep now and have a bit of a rest? Would that help to also get your mind off of things for the minute?

Sitting with you and sending you hugs

Thanks @amber22

Its just started raining here so it’s the perfect time to get some sleep. Ive been told to take some PRN to help with it.

I feel really open, raw and vulnerable.

I hope you have a good sleep @Captain24 and get lots of rest

Let me know how you feel when you wake up and we can always have a chat

Sitting with you and I'm here if you need at all

I will be right by your side @Captain24 and you will not be alone. Even though you can’t touch our skin we are real people and not AI.

I’ll check in on you. 💙🤗💙

I’m so alone. I’m so ashamed.