I can’t cope

I’m suppose to be journaling @Jynx. But I haven’t been able to bring myself to do it.

I’ll just go to bed I think.

Tomorrow is a new day and no nightshift. So I guess that’s a bonus.

Thank you.

Sorry I’m so difficult. I do hate myself for it.

@Captain24 the only person here who thinks you're being difficult is you, hun. I am 100% in the camp of preferring you to talk about it, preferring you to ask for help, preferring you to not suffer alone. Sending you huggles and restful vibes.

I'm off for tonight, take it slow, be gentle w yourself, and I'll see you soon 💜

Hi @Captain24

Hoping today is a little better for you 💜💜

Wishing you a good day @Captain24

Thanks @Bow @Snowie

So far it’s starting out to be sort of ok. I start the day with a little motivation usually. Ive done 3 loads of washing, done the dishes, well the dishwasher did! 😂 plus changed my sheets.

I will continue to keep going. Let’s just hope it stays this way. I don’t preempt anything. Just take is moment and mood as it comes.

My CM rang and it was a good chat. It put somethings into perspective. I have to change my meds as I see fit.

The anger, irritability, agitation, motivation and constant talking are all symptoms of an elevated mood. Damn shame I can’t feel the euphoria that usually comes with it! The really dark times after extreme emotions but still fairly motivated are mixed episodes.

I really need to work at getting a proper sleep. I’m only sleeping between 3-5 hrs. I am following my sleep hygiene routine though.

aargh. This bipolar is just all too hard.

Hey @Captain24

I'm sorry that you're having a challenging day today. I'm sitting with you while you're feeling this way

How was your chat with your CM when they called?

Glad it was a good chat @Captain24

I hope the rest of your day goes ok.

It was really good @amber22. I can’t talk to her now for about 2 weeks she has 2 workplaces. One here and another in a town 2.5 hrs away. I can’t talk to her when she is at the other place. But I am able to email her whenever I need to.

My mood is so over the place @amber22. It’s so hard to manage. In the moments that I feel semi ok. I still have that really low part of me because it’s so mentally draining to be in so many different states in a day. Like, now I’m feeling pretty low but earlier I was ok. It’s just so hard. Hopefully if I play with my meds that might help. It’s only the morning ones that got increased that I’m going to try different things and see if that can level me ok.

I’m hoping so.. @Snowie. I’m in a spiral at the moment but that may change later.

Hope you are doing ok