I can’t cope

Lol.. there was a lot of hair on the floor, but when you look at her, her 'hair tut' is a chunk from what looks like a fringe now lol @Captain24

This little one is a character and a half. You say, "You're so naughty and so cheeky"... then she screams, "No I'm not!"... I reckon she's daddy's little girl and gets spoilt lol

It sure has been a difficult few weeks @Captain24 . I absolutely acknowledge that. I'm glad you trusted us to be able to walk alongside you.

At least it doesn’t look too bad. @tyme It could have been a hole chunk from the side.

She sounds sooo cute. Funny thing.. I was in the toilets at work and I could hear someone and I thought of your niece. ‘Who’s doing wees’ it did make me chuckle.

Have you moved your bed?

Thank you.. I really need all the the being beside me I can get at the moment.

Yes... the 'who's doing wee's' was a little embarrassing... @Captain24

My BIL moved the bed tonight. I hope the kids don't get spoilt and all difficult when the in-laws come. One year is LONG time. But the good thing is that it'll let my sister work an extra day which will help with the bills I guess.... I still don't know what my BIL is doing.

Oh, you the guy moved into my place. My sister bought him a bike. He went to the shops and when he came out, someone had stolen it... my older niece was sooooo upset. She said she will save up to buy him a new one....

At least there is one good thing @tyme. Being able to work a little more should help a little.

I hope they don’t spoil them too much. It’ll be so long and then trying to get the kids back under control after a year. Good luck! This is probably a rude question but I’m going to ask anyway! 😂 But why so long??

I also feel for you. You don’t have your own bed for 12 months either.

Ohhh.. that’s so sad. People just have no respect for other peoples property. Your niece sounds so caring as well. That’s a good trait to have especially at such a young age.

Yeah, I'm actually concerned that my older niece is quite like me @Captain24 I've raised it with my psych once. But he tends to think it'll be okay.... hrmm... I'm talking more about the hypersensitivity side of things.

The aunty is only staying 1.5 months. The parents stay between Melb and Syd because they have 2 kids. So they stay with them for a bit, then stay with my BIL a bit. Oh well...

I'll certainly keep you updated!

Any holiday plans for you?

Well that’s a cheap way to live ! @tyme. I struggle to handle my parents for a week!

Im sure that’s quite concerning for you about your niece. But in saying that if she does show signs at least you are able to catch them early and support her through the journey.

I think it would be so helpful for me to have someone in my life that gets it. I do have a friend I talk to sometimes but I usually just get the whole poor you. Then I have a cousin and she carries on with the poor you but in extreme. I generally feel worse after talking to them. All they want to talk about is how bad things are for me. I don’t always want to talk about. Sometimes I need to forget. My best friend is great. She has just been diagnosed with ADHD and thinks I have a lot of signs of it too. But we have great conversations that don’t revolve around MH.

Anyhows that’s way off topic!

We are going on holidays to the coast on the 30th of this month. It’s going to be really difficult as mums dog ‘Angel’ won’t make it that long. So mum will have to go away having just lost her and have to deal with Pix loving it.

Then we get back on the 6th and Dad starts radiation on the 7th in a town 1 1/2hrs away. But the good thing.. I guess you could say, even though it’s going to be hard, is that mum will be available to go and stay with him for a bit and not worry about Angel

Thank God the house is BIG @Captain24 . In their old place, my sister had a granny flat built at the back for them so they had their own place. In this place, downstairs is very big. The in-laws (I just call them in-laws now) go walking a lot.

My BIL said tonight, "Have a good sleep because it'll be the last good sleep you'll have in a long time!" I just laughed lol. They will be sleeping in the downstairs ensuite and the others will sleep upstairs.

As for Angel.... she won't make it???

I had to laugh they are sleeping in the ensuite’ 😂. Yes definitely enjoy your sleep. At least they won’t be there the whole time. It’s good that they go out. Im sure a little break would be good for all.

Angel will either be given her wings this week or next week. 😢 With her heart failure she is really struggling to breathe. Her heart rate at the vet today was 198 beats per minute. Mums going to be heartbroken, I will be too, but I’m really worried about Pix. She is going to really struggle. When we do give Angel her wings, I’m taking Pix in after it’s done so she can say goodbye and try and help her understand. Im crying typing this..

This just came up on Facebook.

I need to hear this right now.

Awwww Hugs @Captain24 .

I'm so sorry I missed this. I didn't know Angel was deteriorating so fast. I hope she doesn't have to suffer. She can walk that rainbow bridge in a new pain-free body. I'm glad you will take Pix in.

It sounds like it's going to be so hard for everyone.

I hope the break away helps a little, even if it is a time to reflect on all the awesome times you've spent together.

It’s so hard @tyme

She looks good on the outside.If you didn’t know about her heart then you would think she is fine. She still has a little walk and when she is in the pram she sits up and watches everything. At the moment she is not suffering too much. But we need to give her her wings before her heart gives up completely or she will be in so much pain and it’ll be horrific.

The hard thing about going away is I need to take Pix to the beach everyday as she lives it but so did Angel.

Everywhere we go we will have to take Pix but there will be so many memories. Im hoping my can make the memories a good thing.

Mum said tonight is been a horrible year. We lost Nan, I told them about my Bipolar, then Dads cancer diagnosis and at every turn dads cancer had spread and now the radiation. Plus when she loses Angel.

She doesn’t even know the extent of what I’ve been going through. So I’ve got all that mums been going through on top of how dangerous my life has been and is.

Writing this has been a little reflective, I guess you could say. It explains a lot. It has been a lot to deal with on top of my unstable MI