I can’t cope

He asked me if it was about my spots they removed and I said the money of it is just the icing on the cake right now @MissGremlin He told me to make an appointment with him and I told him I see him on Thursday and he was happy about that.

The computer work is so boring! But it will fill a good part of my night after I do the 2 hour drive around with the cleaners. At least they will see me as being proactive. The only thing is is that room is now their office while they renovate their actual office. It’ll be good having people around and coming and going though if they let me use it. I will get up and move. It’s so boring that I have to anyway! 😜

I hope you did get a bit of sleep. Will your eye take long to heal?

Im going to have my phone on me all night. I need something to do to connect while im sitting there.

@Captain24 I'm glad that you have an appointment with him on Thursday.

I can't stand just sitting at a computer so I feel for you there. Having people coming and going will be good to have company throughout the time that you're there. Haha at least you can get up and move unlike being stuck sitting in a truck.

I'm not sure how long it will take, last time it was like it for almost 2 weeks and it was horrible. It's not as bad this time though so I'm hoping it doesn't get worse and gets better quickly. I've been sitting at my table doing the square diamond art that I started ages ago.

Glad you'll be able to have your phone on you tonight, I'm sure I'll be around unless I'm able to sleep.

I’ve just made the work guy get me a doctors appointment for the doctor I saw at the hospital. I want to check that we are doing the right thing with my back. @MissGremlin

Im gals I’m seeing him too but we don’t have much time to go through everything. I did send him the email I got from the dermatology place. He said he may be able to do it. So I’ll see what he says.

When I’m finished with my procedures I’ll go back to where I’m suppose to be so I will be on my own but at least most of the night will be easy.

Hopefully it heals quicker this time. 2 weeks is a long time.

Yay for diamond art during the day and square ones! Mime will be round so we are doing the opposite to what we normally do! 😜

Im about to head into work and will be busy for the first 2 hours and there is only 2 spots I have service while I’m out there so I could be quiet for a bit.

I do hope I don’t hear from you and that you are sleeping. At least you will have someone to talk to after 9:30 of you cat!

@Captain24 definitely need to make sure that the right thing is being done for your back.

I know what you mean about not getting much time with him but hopefully it's long enough.

It's good that you've got an easy night.

Oh i really hope so, last time it took such a toll on me.

Haha it's opposite day 😂. I'll be doing my round one once I'm sitting in bed, though I am tempted to take the square one to bed.

Hoping work goes well for you tonight sweet and I'll chat to you when you're able to and if I'm awake ❤️

They wouldn’t let me do the job I was suppose to do at the start of shift. So I’m just sitting here doing computer work. @MissGremlin

I think maybe just maybe he might be concerned because I cried today. I was pretty embarrassed because the nurse was there as well. She did close the curtain so no one else could see me.

Square is so much better! Which one are you doing?

Im hoping it passes quickly. These procedures are boring though so o don’t think it’ll be quick!

Im setting my cheap watch to alarm at every hour so I know when to get up and move. Right now I’m just walking around outside of the room I’m in.

Are you sleepy?

What was for dinner?

@Captain24 oh that's annoying that they changed it but at least you have the computer work to do.

I'm glad he's showing concern. I know it's embarrassing to cry in front of people but know that it's ok, you've been holding alot sweet.

I'm just doing the round one, it didn't feel right bringing the square one in with me.

Need to find ways to make things fun, you know the only saying 'time flies when you're having fun' 😂.

Good idea having the alarm set, and it's good that you're walking around.

I'm actually exhausted, I've been sleeping alot lately cos of the medication. But last night was still constantly waking up to nightmares.

I had a chicken schnitzel burger for dinner.

It is annoying but at least they are looking out for me. I feel bad that they didn’t let me do it though as it feels like I have let them down. My back is killing me though. @MissGremlin

I think that is the first time I have cried in front of him. I did cry in a phone appointment though.

It’s ok. Squares for days rounds for nights.

It’s a shame about last night. Did you take anything tonight?

@Captain24 you're not letting anyone down sweet, you have a sore back and need to rest to get better.

It's ok that you cried, in fact it just shows how much you've been holding onto for so long.

Yes squares for the daytime and round for bedtime.

No and I didn't take anything last night either.

One of my supervisors just gave me his sign on to do some of these if I get time! Our secret! @MissGremlin 😜

I think crying this much is showing a little improvement as I am letting out my emotions. I’ve done quite a bit of it lately.

Im glad you haven’t taken anything. Yes you might not be sleeping but its way better physically for you to not take them.

How much do you have to go on the round one you are doing?

@Captain24 oh a sneaky secret 😂.

It's good to let the emotions out, we need to let ourselves feel things at times in order to move through them.

Well with Saturday it was a bit too much so I'm trying to stop. It just sucks having such disturbed sleep.

I've only done 2 sections but almost finished the 1st row. I'm about to pack it up for the night, between feeling exhausted and like i have a seizure coming, I just want to lay down (I'm safe).