I can’t cope

I feel like the night is really dragging on, I've been trying to sleep for over 2 hours but I'm just tossing and turning. I'm panicking about the sleep study tomorrow, I don't know exactly what it involves or how I'll go with it. I keep looking at the clock thinking and feeling like it's been ages but yet only a few minutes have passed. My mind is in overdrive at the moment, there's so much racing through it and I'm struggling to slow it down. I just want the night to be over already, it's getting so hard to get through the night and then the days when I'm not able to get any rest. I've tried so many things to wind down and hopefully get some rest but nothing has helped, it's so frustrating and disheartening. I'm safe, snuggled up in bed with Casper and I'm waiting to connect to a service.

Hi @MissGremlin

It sounds exhausting to be lying there wanting desperately to rest while your mind continues racing and every few minutes feels so much longer. With the uncertainty of tomorrow’s sleep study on top of how difficult sleep has already been, it makes sense that tonight is feeling particularly overwhelming and frustrating.

I can hear how hard you’ve been trying to find something that helps, and how disheartening it is when nothing seems to settle things. I'm glad to hear you’re safe, comfortable with Casper and waiting to connect with some additional support tonight.

I hope everything quietens down for you and you're able to rest. ✨🌻

Hello @SunsetSunrise, it really is exhausting and frustrating. I'd actually managed to doze off for a while but of course I've woken up in a complete panic 😞. I really want to be able to sleep through the night without nightmares and panic attacks. My tummy is feeling so unsettled cos I'm not able to sleep, then that triggers the emetophobia so only makes me more anxious. I feel broken beyond repair, like it doesn't matter what I do I'm still going to be stuck like this.

It's no wonder that my thoughts go to longing for an escape from everything when things are like this. Every part of me is desperate for relief but it never comes, it's just a vicious cycle every day and every night. I'm safe, laying in bed with Casper and I'm listening to music.

It sounds so exhausting to have finally gotten some sleep, only to wake up feeling panicked again, @MissGremlin. I can hear how worn down you’re feeling by this cycle, especially when you’ve been trying so hard to find some relief.

I’m really glad to hear you’re safe right now and have Casper with you while you listen to some music. I hope having that comfort around you makes tonight feel even a little less lonely.

Thankyou @SunsetSunrise ❤️. I'm hoping things settle enough soon so that I can try to get some more sleep. This night feels like it's gone on forever.

Hi @Captain24

That’s a big change! It sounds like a really positive one though, especially if you’re finding yourself enjoying the days more rather than just wishing for bedtime to come around 😊

I hope you’re able to sort out your sleep too, as it can make such a difference to how you feel during the day. What would you like to change about your sleep if you could? Hopefully you can have a good chat about it with your GP on Friday

I feel you, having some fresh air and a nice breeze coming through the house is so lovely, but when it gets too cold, it’s definitely time to close everything up haha

I remember you telling me this, you really do love the heat! I think I’d melt away in 38–40 degree weather haha. My skin and body just don’t cope too well with the heat unfortunately

How are you feeling today? 💛

Hi @MissGremlin

Oh I love that! I re-watch the Harry Potter movies every year, they're my comfort movies too. How do you feel about them making a series? I think it comes out in December this year

How are you feeling today? Also, were you notified about your post? 💛

Hello @Nala2022 sweet, they're such good movies. I'm not sure about the series though, I much prefer the originals.

I'm struggling alot today, it was a very bad night last night 😞. I haven't heard back about my post.

I'm safe and about to make a cuppa and do my morning routine.

How are you doing sweet?

I get what you mean. I’ll watch the series, but it definitely won’t be the same as the originals

I’m sorry you’re struggling today @MissGremlin, especially after having such a bad night ☹️

I’m glad you’ve got your morning routine and a cuppa to help ease into the day. Be gentle with yourself today and take things one step at a time. We’re all here for you 💛

I’ll chase that up for you today and see if I can get an update on your post 😊

I had a cuppa earlier too! I hope you enjoy yours

I'm a bit tired, but overall I'm doing okay. Thanks for asking lovely

@Nala2022 it probably sounds silly but I get scared to watch new series/remakes just in case it ruins the original, especially when it's my comfort shows/movies.

I think I'm meant to have my support worker for the last time today, I'm scared to lose that support aswell as it's all I've got. I feel like occasionally I'm able to take one tiny step forward but then it's a million steps back 😞.

Thankyou for that reminder to be gentle with myself and to take things one step at a time, I really needed that. Thankyou sweet ❤️.

No worries, thankyou ☺️.

Glad you're doing ok overall despite being tired, I hope that today treats you with the kindness you deserve ❤️.

Here's the Willy Wonka chocolate bar that i made, I finished it yesterday. Wasn't happy with how the white paint came out but the little one it's for loves it ☺️. Also don't know why the camera doesn't like the white and makes it look like the beams are coming out of the writing 😂.