I can’t cope

I’m sorry yesterday was such a hard day for you @MissGremlin. Even though your brain was too busy to enjoy the sun, you still made the effort to sit outside, and that really does count. When things feel this heavy it can be so hard to see a way forward, but from all our chats I know there’s so much strength and resilience in you, even when you can’t feel it yourself. I hope your appointment goes well today lovely, and that you’re able to take things gently 💛

I’m doing okay . I was enjoying all the sunshine we had the last few days, but now it’s rain and wind again. Definitely a day to stay warm!

@Captain24 you've done amazing to get so much done, well done sweet. I really hope you can get lots of sleep now, you definitely deserve it.

It's so hard things being like this constantly and I am so sick of it being this way but nothing I seem to do changes anything. I'm really glad that things are better for you, you've put in so much hard work and it's fantastic that things are falling into place. It's hard doing this with no proper support, not sleeping has a huge impact aswell (I'm safe).

I've only got one more row of sections to do on my custom diamond art so I'm trying to focus on that.

@Nala2022 thankyou sweet ❤️. Right now I really don't see or feel that strength and resilience, I see someone that's weak, stupid and pathetic. Hearing myself say that actually just gave me an idea of what I should do. Going back a while ago I asked people on the forums to come up with some positive words about me and then I wrote some of them down on this which I've just stuck on the wall in front of me.

Thankyou, I'm really hoping the meeting goes ok today and that i can get moved up to category 1.

Hopefully you get some more sunshine soon so you can enjoy it again. It's a bit on and off today but we have rain expected, had alot last night with a storm.

I can hear how difficult this is for you, and I know how easy it can be to believe our thoughts, especially when they’re so negative.

That’s great that you still have that list. Try to remind yourself that those positive words are true, rather than the negative words that come into your mind. I know it’s easier said than done, but with practice, over time it can become easier to challenge those negative self-beliefs and start to really believe in your own worth. I think you’re kind, creative, strong, brave and compassionate @MissGremlin 💛

I hope you get to move up to Category 1 too! 😊

Me too, I think the weather is meant to be better again over the weekend. Hopefully you get some better weather coming your way again soon

@Nala2022 it's so hard and I struggle to challenge those negative thoughts and feelings towards myself. Years of being told negative things about me has me believing it and then turning everything against myself aswell, it's not easy to change or undo that trauma. I want to be able to see myself differently, to think differently without the constant negativity.

That list means so much to me, it came from many people here on the forums, people that barely knew me but saw things that I can't. Awww thankyou sweet, those words truly mean alot ❤️.

I just checked the weather here for the next few days and there's a little bit of sun coming but still cloudy. We'll just have to make the most of the sunshine when it makes an appearance!

I'm really sorry you went through all of that @MissGremlin. When you’ve spent years hearing negative things about yourself, it makes sense that those thoughts can feel so deeply ingrained. You’re right that it isn’t something you can just undo overnight, but I really believe you can slowly learn to see yourself differently with time and practice (coming from my own experience) but I know everyone's journey is different, I just hope you know that you're not alone here.

I think it’s really special that those words came from people here who could see things in you that you couldn’t see in yourself, and you deserve to hear those positive things about yourself too

Sounds like we’ll both have to make the most of every little bit of sunshine when it decides to show up!

@Nala2022 the saddest part is that it still happens, I'm still told so many hurtful things. I try hard to not let it get to me but words really can hurt when they come from people that are meant to care about you. I'm sorry that you've had your own experiences but it's what makes this space so special and important, you and others here get it, you know how hard it is. But it gives me a little bit of hope knowing that it's possible to change things, it's just a very long and hard process. It also helps immensely to know that I'm not alone and that I'm cared about here.

The people on the forums aren't just random people, we get to know each other and become like an extended family. I'd honestly be lost without this space and the support I'm able to both give and receive here.

We most definitely will! I'm about to get ready to head out soon, my anxiety is really high over this appointment today.

I’m really sorry that you’re still having to hear hurtful things from people who are meant to care about you @MissGremlin. It makes sense that it still hurts, even when you’re trying your best not to let it get to you. I really love that you’re able to see some hope in knowing that things can change, even if it’s a long process

And I completely understand what you mean about the forums becoming more than just a place to post, you get to know people and build those connections over time. I’m really glad this space has been able to give you that sense of care and support 🫶

I hope your appointment goes okay today lovely. I know your anxiety is really high, but just take it one step at a time 💛

Thankyou @Nala2022 sweet, I'm at the place where my appointment is now.

I hope you enjoy the rest of your day, keep being the amazing you the you are ❤️

I truly hope it goes really well for you @MissGremlin

Thanks lovely, I hope you do too and feel better as the day goes on. You’re sweet, thank you for your kind words. Right back at you 💛