I can’t cope

Are you in bed or on the lounge? @MissGremlin 

@Captain24 sitting on my lounge, have a movie playing aswell.

That sounds comfy and relaxing @MissGremlin. what movie?

@Captain24 Harry Potter, not coping with change so just keep watching them over and over again.

I just made a hot chocolate and took some pain relief. Almost finished the first row of sections on my diamond art.

At least it’s something comforting for you @MissGremlin I can’t do the noise in the background it overwhelms me!

That’s cool you have nearly finished that row.

Ive put it down for now and gotten into bed. The dogs have decided that it’s time to play though! My body just feels so tired. I’m still mentally and physically tired too. I’ve been distracted most of the day but it’s night now and all the thoughts have come back.

I should get this section finished before I go back to work! The next 2 sections are all grass so it’ll take ages. That slows me down heaps having to look for all the single dots.

I hope you can find a little bit of sleep tonight. Thinking of you.

@Captain24 yeah I have moments where I can't cope with any noise.

I'm sorry those thoughts are there, hoping sleep comes to you quickly sweet.

The grass would definitely take a longer time but you do so well to do it.

Thankyou sweet, sending you lots of love and hugs, night night ❤️.

I understand this feeling very well @MissGremlin. I know it must feel so overwhelming right now, but please know that you're never alone whilst you have us here. 💛 I am so glad you have Casper by your side tonight. What is helping to alleviate some of this panic? Have you got any shows playing/doing any art?

@AuntGlow it's so overwhelming. Thankyou sweet, just having this space helps so much to connect in moments like that. I've been doing my diamond art for several hours now, I've had a hot chocolate and been watching Harry Potter. Things settled a bit but I'm not sleepy so that's making things tough. My throat is also really sore and my chest hurts when I cough, I'm so over this silly cold that won't go away (I'm safe).

This is so wholesome, and also really amazing support to one another re: accountability and recovery. 🥰 @Captain24

Weetbix - yum! I think I need to get into Weetbix again. What do you have them with?

I am sure you will get a BIG rest tonight.

It was lovely. 🤩

So fair about the gym, I am only going because I am trying to make sure I #livelongandprosper 🖖

I am so glad you had a trauma-informed instructer, that makes all the difference. Tbh, I actually got really anxious today, but I held space for it and reminded myself that I don't need to get the whole routine perfect yet - and it helped! (Who would have thought? 😂).

I am really happy that you're feeling lighter. I hope this is a reminder for you that not all feelings are forever. 🥰

I am sure that money will come back around, you work SO hard!

Oh, I am so sorry you have had to cancel. Have you talked with her about payment plan options?

I pour boiling water over my weevil and make them all soggy and warm and then pour condensed milk over them!!!! @AuntGlow

it’s 3 am and I have been up 4 times. I keep waking up after having dreams, I don’t usually have dreams. It’s really hard.

Im not going to lit be to old age. Bipolar people die younger. I don’t care though. But it’s so good you are looking out for yourself. That is a good thing.

Well done on the self talk. Maybe I need to try the ‘it doesn’t have to be perfect’ yhing some times. I’m a bit of a perfectionist and nothing ever makes that standard so I beat myself up!

I do feel lighter. The connection on here is so so important I discovered. I still had deep dark thoughts before going to bed. The thoughts are always there just sometimes not so loud.

I don’t have the money for payment plans. After tomorrow I will have $200 until Friday week. That has to cover fuel!

Im really hoping we can get Pix right soon and then things will settle down a bit. Hopefully.

I hope you are sleeping well.