I can’t cope

@Captain24 oh sweet, I'm glad you've got your diamond art but I can hear how tired you are.

Honestly last night I feel was 3 hours of my life wasted, I would have much preferred sitting in bed and doing my diamond art. Was actually really disappointed that the people that won seemed to be known to the radio station hosts and I wasn't the only one to notice this.

That’s a shame @MissGremlin

That stuff always seems to be like that.

Do you know what though? I’m proud of you for going. You stepped out of your comfort zone and went, I’m not sure I could have done that. Ok, don’t wasn’t a great night but you did it and aren’t wondering whether you should have gone while sitting at home.

I am so proud.

@Captain24 unfortunately yes it does.

I even had to interact with a stranger that came alone and asked to sit next to us. It felt very awkward though and it was hard to answer questions when she asked them. Thankfully she found out some of her friends were there so she went off to be with them.

I'm feeling so tired today, I'd only been asleep for an hour last night when I woke up after having a nightmare and my body was in a full on panic. I just got up to feed Casper and make a coffee plus I've got some meds to take to hopefully ease the headache and nausea.

Thankyou sweet ❤️.

I’m even more prouder of you! @MissGremlin. You handled yourself really well. It was hard but you did it, talking to a stranger isn’t easy!

You have no idea how impressed with you I am. It doesn’t make life easier but you did it. You don’t talk to anyone!

Sorry you didn’t sleep well. The nightmares must be so hard. I’m just about to feed my dogs. They are sound asleep so I keep waking them up! That’s what they did to me all night! I hope the coffee and pain relief help. I’m almost finished the next section of diamond art so I’ve used my time wisely! 😜

@Captain24 thankyou sweet, it truly means alot to hear that.

Funnily enough I actually get stuck talking to people quite often, seems I look approachable to others 😂. As I kid I used to walk up the mall and ask people for donations when I was doing fundraisers (back in the day when it was allowed), looking back now i honestly don't know how i had the courage to 😂.

I'm over the nightmares, it's taking such a toll on me. If my doctor doesn't look into a medication to help or a sleep study I'm honestly thinking about seeing another GP, not permanently but just to get a second opinion basically.

Haha poor Pix and Jett 😂. Little ratbags for keeping you awake last night, it's lucky they're cute.

You've done well with the diamond art already this morning. What time are you seeing your friend?

I do sometimes too. I’m that person that walks past people and smile and say hello. @MissGremlin. Born and raised in a small country town does that to you!

I think a second opinion is a good idea. There must be something to help. I still have to organise my sleep study!

Lucky they are cute and I love them so much!

Im going to my friends at 10 so then I can come home at lunchtime and sleep this afternoon if I need to! I’m hoping I’ll get this section finished in the next half hour so I can go and have a shower and get dressed. Oh and I had 2 showers yesterday! Go me!!!

What are your plans for the day?

@Captain24 yes it does. I wasn't raised in a small town but I was raised to always be respectful and I used to be able to approach anyone.

There has to be something and something needs to be done cos i can't keep going like this, I need to be able to sleep and not constantly have nightmares and panic attacks throughout the night aswell as the day.

Glad you're seeing your friend early and I'm hoping that you can get a nap in today. Woohoo look at you go yesterday, that's an amazing achievement, so proud of you sweet.

I need to go to the shops today but won't do that until after lunch. I'm hoping to get some more sleep soon before I have to get up but right now it's far too noisy and stressful here (I'm safe).

I’ve never been able to approach people. I’ve always been really shy and I still am. Turns out that’s from AuDHD! @MissGremlin

I finished that section and did the first colour on the next section. I’m starting to get into it. I’m about to have my shower and get dressed. I’ve been getting dressed everyday. Not slopping around in the same tracksuit for days. Means more washing though!!!

Im a little nervous as I don’t know what to talk about!

I hope you can get a nap in. You need it.

@Captain24 i hope the visit with your friend is going well sweet.

I managed a very small nap but woke up in a panic as usual. I'm safe and I'll start to get ready to head to the shops soon.

I’ve just walked in the door. @MissGremlin.

It was really good. We have both change in the last few years but in the same way. Her girlfriend wanted to see me so came around as well!

It was just a feel good time. I’m proud of myself for going. I wasn’t invited I actually organise it which is huge.

Glad you got a little bit of sleep shame about th usual panic though.

I hope it’s just a quick trip for you and goes smoothly. I’m going to have something to eat and then see if I do diamond art or go to bed.