I can’t cope

Hey @MissGremlin, thank you for letting the community know that you are safe! I encourage you to talk your thoughts through with your counsellor when they call in 30 minutes so they are aware of how frequently you are experiencing them. Take care RiverSeal

@RiverSeal i will be. I've already been messaging my counsellor this morning so she's aware as it can be hard to bring up when on a call.

It’s really hard when it feels that way. Have you been sitting on the kitchen floor? That seemed to ground you a little bit? Are you able to have your coffee or iced coffee sitting outside? Just little things that are different. @MissGremlin. change of scenery.

It’s lucky that you have to get out of bed. My GP told me as long as I got out of bed and did one thing that it didn’t matter if I went back to bed. But I found that once I had gotten up and done something I usually just sat in the lounge until the afternoon and then went back to bed. You are doing so well to keep doing diamond art. I couldn’t do it or anything else. I just sat.

I hope your counsellor appointment goes well. That she listens and supports you.

I’ve done so much. The other room is mostly sorted but I don’t want to do any more of it. I’ll do it another day. Now to seal the diamond arts and have a shower and head out!

Then the rest of the day is mine. I have physio tomorrow and I’ll do a couple of other things out and about. Then it’s mine too. Saturday I’ll go see my bestie and that’s my out of the house time. Other than that the day is mine as well. I’m just a little bit proud of myself right now. I have achieved a lot and I deserve a rest!

@Captain24 I'm completely broken right now. My counsellor started the phone call with 'this will be the last session as my senior practitioner is making me cut contact'. She's the only person I had, she stuck by me even though it wasn't the right service for me but she was trying to find me the right support. I'm hurting so much, the tears haven't stopped and my head is pounding. I'm safe, I'm just snuggled with Casper with a movie on in the background.

Hey @MissGremlin, sorry to hear about your counsellor and that this was your final session. You are a very resilient and brave person who has been staying strong for a long time. Please stay connected with the community as you are to feel less isolated, heard and underdstood. I have sent you an email if you want to check your inbox 🙂 RiverSeal

Oh no!!!! 😢 😢 I’m so sorry to hear that @MissGremlin. I can only imagine the rejection and abandonment you are feeling right now. Please take care of yourself. Just let the tears fall. It’s such hard news to take.

Can you go and try to have a nap? Maybe you can cry yourself to sleep. I know that’s sometimes what happens with me, if I actually let myself cry.

Im here with you and I hear you.

Thankyou @RiverSeal, right now I don't feel resilient, brave or strong. I'll try to stay connected but my brain is truly a mess at the moment and I'm struggling so much with the thoughts. I didn't need this today, not when things already felt so heavy. I've read your email, just finding it hard with words. I'm safe still snuggling with Casper.

@Captain24 thankyou sweet ❤️. The tears have stopped so suddenly which I don't like. But I've cried for well over an hour, they didn't stop the whole time I was on the phone to her. I can't nap as I need to go out at 2.30pm so it's really not worth it. I'm safe, snuggling with Casper.

Can you do me a favour and have a big drink of water? Just to try and help with your headache and rehydrate your self a little. @MissGremlin

That’s a long time to cry. That’s hard that you have to go out. Can you change it? I’m glad you are safe. It’ll take a little while to come to terms with it. So give yourself time. You will grieve for it and that’s ok.

I’ve been out and done everything. I have put the first coat of sealer on and now have to wait for that to dry. So I am done. I’m exhausted and just want to sleep. But it’s ok.. I’ll do some diamond art.

@Captain24 I've just made an iced coffee and I'm going to take some pain relief.

I have to go out, if I'm lucky one of the workers that I know will be on so I might be able to get a hug. It really does feel like such a huge loss right now especially on top of the other losses I've had over the past few months.

You've done so well to get everything done sweet. If you need to have a sleep then please do so. I'll be ok, I'm just sitting here with Casper at the moment.