I can’t cope

@Captain24 sorry you're still in pain sweet, hoping the pain relief helps so you can sleep.

It's such a horrible feeling. I'm sorry you know the feeling too 😞.

Sending sleepy vibes your way sweetheart ❤️.

I’ve woken up very tired and sore @MissGremlin

If it makes you feel that way why do you do it? You said the other day wasn’t a once off?

I hope you got some sleep.

It was a real struggle to go to work today. I was so tired from not sleeping properly. I just wanted to stay asleep. But I got up and went.

The day wasn’t too bad. They got a fair bit of rain last night so the roads were all wet today and my job was to put water down. So a sat around all morning then a truck thought he was on fire so I sat with that for a while, waited until workshop had started it and tested it and then went and settled some dust down.

The roads are a mess with massive potholes everywhere. My back is so sore that I can only take little steps. I stepped in a hole and the pain shot right up my spine and took my breath away. I have a chiropractor appointment at 10 tomorrow so I’m hoping he can help.

My thoughts are really really dark and loud. They are consuming me. They are taking my whole being. It’s hard to think of anything else. My jaw and teeth are sore from clenching them constantly. My body (other than my back) is aching like I’m getting a cold. I feel like that all the time but it never comes.

I don’t know what I need tonight other than a break. I’m about to have some dinner feed the dogs and then a shower. What comes next will be interesting. See what happens.

Hey @Captain24!

What's next for ya that's gonna be 'interesting'?

I'm sorry to hear you're in so much pain, I hope you're able to take it easy tonight 🤞

I’m just about to feed the dogs but it hurts so so much to bend over. Putting the bowls down will be hard but then having to bend long enough to put the needle in. @Jynx

Oh truuuue @Captain24 that's so rough. It's really intense when our mobility is affected hey. I hope it went ok 🤞

It hurt but it’s done. @Jynx

Do you have time to chat? It’s all good if you are to busy I understand.

It’s ok @Jynx. don’t worry about it. You are too busy and I don’t want to take your time from someone that may need you.

I was just going to use you for distraction to keep me safe but I’ll just go to bed instead. I’ve taken a heap of pain killers (safely) so I’m hoping that reduces the pain even a little bit and I’ll maybe get some sleep.

Sorry for being difficult and requesting what you can’t do anymore

So my air conditioner is broken. Just in time for the cold snap. Just what I need. More money as well. I can’t get a break with money. They are coming to look at it on Friday not sure how much it will cost or if they can fix it in the day.

I am getting a cold. I woke up during the night multiple times sneezing. My nose is running and my eyes are watering.

My back is still sore which is not helpful. The pain is really bringing me down.

I feel so down and out. My thoughts are really heavy and I really don’t wish to exist anymore. Life is just way too hard. I’m not sure how much longer I can take it. I’m safe for now but who knows.

Hi @Captain24 I’m sorry you’re going through all of this at once. Dealing with all these things would be really draining on anyone, it makes sense that you’re feeling worn down.

I’m really glad you’ve said you’re safe right now. When things feel this heavy, it can be hard to see any relief in the moment, but you don’t have to sit with it alone. If you feel able to, it might also help to reach out to someone you trust, or contact supports like Lifeline (13 11 14) or Beyond Blue (1300 22 4636) for extra support.

If you’re up for it, is there anything small that’s helped even a little in moments like this before, or anything you can lean on today while you’re feeling unwell?

We’re here with you