I can’t cope

Morning @Captain24 sweet, how's things feeling for you today?

I took pain relief last night that last 24 hours so now it’s feeling better @MissGremlin. I’ll take another one before I go to work.

I did manage to get to sleep last night so that was good. I turned my alarm off this morning and went back to sleep. When I woke up I had to rush and get to the supermarket and back before Pixies alarm went off. I have been flat out ever since. I have done washing and hung it out, grocery shopping and packed away, cooked the mince for pasta bake and then I’ve have the pasta boiling. I still have so much to do though.

Im stressing and couldn’t focus so I wrote a list. That has helped a little. Feeling really stressed and down. Overwhelmed with today and with hard thoughts.

How are you feeling?

@Captain24 I'm glad you took pain relief and that you were able to get some sleep.

It sounds like it's been a very busy morning for you, but you are doing amazing sweet with everything you've done. I'm always so proud of how you continue to push through even even things are so hard, I know it's cos we have to but it's still such a huge achievement.

I'm glad the list has helped a little, just take it one thing at a time sweetheart and you've got this. I know those thoughts are tough to sit with but I'm here with you and we can sit with them together.

Things are feeling really heavy after last night, there's a post in my thread if you want to read it but no pressure to, I'm aware it may be triggering so I didn't tag anyone in it but i know you'll probably understand it. I'm safe and trying to be gentle with myself today.

Pasta bake is cooking @MissGremlin. I’m just on the phone to mum. I still have to clean my dishes but I’ll do that when I get off the phone. Then all I have to do is eat and pack my dinners up. Drop the dogs in and go to bed.

That’s scary about last night. I’m glad you managed to safely get through. I’d be scared if you weren’t around. I really do care for you and would be devastated if something happened to you. Please be careful and look after yourself. Be very gentle today and stay safe and calm. If all you can do is be in bed then that’s ok.

@Captain24 I'm glad the pasta bake is cooking. Hope the phone call with mum is good.

It was really scary, I'm still trying to work out what got me through. I feel the same way about you sweet. We both need to be careful and look after ourselves as best we can. I'm thinking of making something to eat and then laying on my lounge with Casper, I really feel empty today and have no energy.

It’s a lot to come back from @MissGremlin.

Thats why I couldn’t manage to go to work on Friday. I just need to be gentle and look after myself. I was just scared of how I was the night before and really unsure of myself the next day.

As much as I’d like a decent break from work, I am lucky I have it. It gives me purpose and routine. It gets me out of the house and I still get a few days between each block to relax and take time out.

@Captain24 it really is alot to come back from.

I'm glad you took the day off to look after yourself. I've already had to go out this morning and I'll have to again this afternoon. But for the moment I'm just trying to relax as much as I can. I'm scared of how things were last night and the uncertainty is hard to sit with.

It's that fine line between it, both needing a break but also that it's good to have work. I'm glad you do have those blocks in between though and I always enjoy catching up on your days off ☺️.

The uncertainty is so hard. Also just trying to process the extreme. @MissGremlin

I am and will be thinking of you.

The days off are good. I can have appointments, I have time to myself especially now I’m trying to give myself downtime and also, yes, the connection on here with you and trying to outside of here even though it’s not much.

Im going to bed now sorry. I have to iron when I wake up but if I get spare time I will pop on but can’t guarantee it sorry. Give me u til Wednesday and the I’ll be around a lot more for 5 days.

I really do think of you especially on nightshifts.

@Captain24 I'm hoping you can get a good sleep sweet and it's ok if you don't have time to pop on. I think of you always especially when you're at work.

Thankyou for being here and for also being so kind, caring and understanding. Sending so much love and hugs sweetheart ❤️.

I’ve only got a couple of minutes before I leave but I will have 5 minutes at the smoke stop too hopefully @MissGremlin

I did sleep well, I wondered what that noise was when my alarm went off! 😂 I’m now rugged up and ready for work plus I have packed a jacket. 3 degrees over night 🥶

How has today gone for you? Did you rest and start to settle after such a rough night?