I can’t cope

@Captain24 it will be.

No we haven't met before, only able to chat via text due to health restrictions. But we chat everyday which I'm glad cos she doesn't have much support around her.

There's a few people I'd love to meet aswell. Sometimes the anonymity sucks but I completely understand it too. Even in an anonymous space connections can be made though. And I'm going to leave this subject alone now before i get myself into trouble 😂.

The pounding headaches afterwards suck. Casper licks my tears aswell. Really do wonder what they think sometimes. But they are such a comfort to have around.

Your psych really does sound amazing, I loved reading the post yesterday about her cheering you on. My counsellor is the same when I do things that she sees as little wins. I actually have a phone appointment with her tomorrow.

Thankyou sweet and know that I'm here for you too ❤️.

I do love the anonymity of it all @MissGremlin. It did freak me out a little when I discovered that someone actually knows me on here and apparently we have talked. She hasn’t been on for a while she said but I don’t know her username and she doesn’t know mine.

They are a comfort. Jett always has to be near me or at least know exactly where I am and if I move he comes and checks where I’m going!

Im glad you have an appointment with her and that she cheers you on as well. It’s a nice feeling to have someone happy for you even over the little things. I’ve never had that.

Im okish. Just sitting and doing my diamond art and focusing on it. Hoping my delivery comes this afternoon and not tomorrow afternoon as I’m nearly finished! I’ve been doing it since 7 this morning. I think everything will fall apart if I stop.

@Captain24 yes the anonymity is good, though you know what's happened for me. It's weird knowing people in a space that's meant to be an anonymous but I guess at least you don't know each other's usernames.

Casper always has to know where I am too or be laying on top of me 😂. But I really wouldn't have it any other way.

It's a nice feeling even when I don't feel like i deserve it. Like the things I've done aren't really wins though, just things I have to do.

Oh wow to almost being finished. Really hoping that delivery comes today for you. I get that feeling that if you stop everything will fall apart. Just know that I'm here sweet ❤️.

So much for me getting a sleep 😂. Thinking I should bath Casper and then hop in the shower myself.

Sorry.. I had my phone on charging and got stuck into finishing my diamond art and forgot to check it. @MissGremlin

I love Jett being around all the time. Sometimes it can get annoying when he is in my face (literally) when I’m trying to watch tv or eat!

As much as it’s just what you have to do, it is a little win because you actually got up and did it. I don’t really see it myself but I try to and try to see it as an accomplishment. It’s hard though as it has to be done and there is no one else to do it.

I hope you are getting Casper bathed and having a shower. I’m thinking about having one. I have to go into town and pick up my script.

Here it is.

 @Jynx @AuntGlow @tyme

@Captain24 all good sweet. That pictureof Elvis looks awesome, well done for finishing it.

Haha oh I get it, they sometimes just need to learn a little bit of personal space 😂.

Yes that's the same for me, I know it's good that I got up and did it but it's only cos I had to.

Hope you manage a shower and that picking up your script goes ok.

I gave Casper a bath and took him outside for zoomies and towel dried him at the same time. I had a shower after which was nice but now I'm feeling completely out of energy and just really down (I'm safe).

I missed a phone call before from the mental health team so had to ring back but then the person I needed to talk to wasn't available. But she just rang me back and said that the support worker package they put in for has been accepted. They are coming out on Tuesday now to meet me and we will go from there.

I'm laying in bed with Casper and hoping I can nap for a bit as my head hurts from crying.

I did have a shower and cleaned my teeth. @MissGremlin. I got my script and I called into chemist warehouse. I was supposed to to find chewable toothbrush balls and apparently they sell them but ours is only little and don’t. I did get antiseptic mouthwash though so hopefully I can use that when there is too many steps to brush my teeth.

Oh a support worker sounds great. My friend has a support worker and they do all sorts of things. Hopefully it works out for you.

I hope you get a little bit of sleep as it’s exhausting crying.

Im panicking and short of breath because my delivery isn’t here and I don’t know what to do.

@Captain24 you did really well to shower and do your teeth sweet, well done. That's a shame they don't have the chewable ones you're after but the mouthwash will be good.

It might be ok but I'm not sure what they can really offer me. I don't cope with having people in my house and I'm not one to like going out places. But we will see how it goes when I meet them.

I really hope I can for a bit, but in saying that if you need me at all then I'm here ☺️.

I totally get that panic sweet, try to slow your breathing down, gently in and slowly out. Do you get notified when it's going to be delivered at all?

No it’s ok. Please get some sleep @MissGremlin. You need it. Maybe I should go and lay down. I’m not tired though.

It says tomorrow but usually it comes a day early. It’ll just all of a sudden appear on the app as ‘coming today’ I was hoping it would but there is only 2 hours to go before they stop deliveries. There hasn’t been an update on the app since 10pm last night.

Im trying to breathe. It scares me that I don’t have anything to do that’s simple. It scares me as to where my head will go now that it’s not doing anything.

Just respond when you wake up, please don’t stay awake because of me!

@Captain24 really hoping it does come today for you sweet.

I can really understand the fear of not having something simple to do. Do you like colouring or painting?

I'm here sweet and i want to be here to support you ❤️

I’ve tried both and don’t like them. @MissGremlin. I never really liked colouring in as a kid either and paint by numbers feels the same. I did try though.

I might take something and go to bed for a little while. Maybe that will make time pass a bit quicker.

Please rest, I feel bad for taking you from what you need to do.