I can’t cope

I’ve just had a quick bite to eat and I’ve come down to the beach with them. Mum is going to ring me when I’m able to go back. I’m literally sobbing, I even cried in front of mum.

@AlwaysMyself @MissGremlin

@Captain24 I'm glad you've gone to the beach with them sweet. I hope it helps to calm down a bit and I'm sure the dogs will love it.

It might be a good thing for the family to see how upsetting it is for you @Captain24 ?

Help them be more aware and sensitive to your needs also?

Going down to the beach with the dogs is such a great idea for calming both you and the dogs. 🥰. Well done!

Plus - you wanted a bit extra beach time too, so win win! And less time to hear your mum and bro together. 😊

Pix was really distressed and it was affecting her breathing. I was scared she was going to have another episode. So I just sat on the rocks for a bit with them. Crying but slowly calming down. @AlwaysMyself @MissGremlin

Pix settled a little so we walked really slowly and gentle. I was looking at the sunset and then turn around to look at my dogs. This guy can out of the surf right next to me. It was my cousin. He didn’t know we were here. It was just a random coincidence. It was good to see him.

Just as I finished talking to him mum and dad came down to the beach. We watched the sunset and then walked back to the car. We came back here and fed the dogs as they hadn’t eaten. Pix is a bit upset so I'm being gentle with her.

Mum has been very careful with me too. She hasn’t really said much about any of it but has been really nice.

Im really not ok with it all. It hurt a lot, I disliked the way things happen, I dislike my brother and his inconsideration. Actually my whole previous post still stands. I don’t feel any better other than he is not here. Tonight walking along the beach I wished that I had my laptop and could make an app with my psych. We knew the time with my brother wasn’t going to go well but we didn’t expect this.

Im sorry.. I have been trying really hard not to be to negative on here. Trying to look like I’m getting better but I just crashed tonight and ruined what I was trying to show on here

Oh and the sunset.

@Captain24 oh sweetheart, it sounds like it's been a really tough time. I'm glad you took a slow and gentle walk with your Pix and Jett and seeing your cousin sounds like a nice surprise.

I'm glad your mum is being nice and careful with you sweet.

I'm sorry it's been so hard with your brother, it's horrible how things are 😞.

You're not being negative sweet, your being open and honest about what's happening for you. We are here for you always, through the good and the bad.

Sending you love and hugs sweetheart ❤️.

Can't wait to see the pics ☺️

I really am sorry @MissGremlin. You have a lot on your plate and I’ve tried to be very careful and considerate of others but that last post didn’t met any of that.

Im not sure there are any mods around to approve it, I really didn’t think my post about my brother would go through

@Captain24 sweetheart you have nothing to apologise for, I'm here for you ❤️.

Those sunset pictures are stunning, such a beautiful view 😍.

That beach is one of the best on the east coast, not many east coast beaches get sunsets. They face the wrong way. @MissGremlin. As good as those photos are it was really one of the best that I have seen there. They get heaps better than that, but that’s the first sunset we have seen.

It is a beautiful beach though. It’s my favourite beach to walk along and Pixie’s favourite beach.

I think I might go to sleep. I’m laying here crying again. I don’t feel real good. I’m having a little bit of trouble. I don’t think I have to see my brother again so hopefully tomorrow might be a bit better. Hopefully I can lift this even for a couple of days to actually really enjoy this holiday. The beach has been good but really cold weather. Still not working real well for mindfulness. The marine park was good and feeding and patting the sharks and stingrays was good. I’m trying to find some highlights.

@Captain24 i hope you can get a good night's sleep sweet. Hoping tomorrow is a brighter day for you sweetheart, you are doing well to find the highlights ❤️.

Hello lovely, it sounds like things are really hard with your family at the moment, particularly your brother... could you please tag me in any specific posts about this, so I can make sure I am fully understanding what is happening? @Captain24

Also, I wanted you to know that I will be around a bit more later in the week, but for now, are you able to look at where you can find pockets of safety and grounding for yourself?

I know it must be really, really tough to do so in this moment, but what might bring you some comfort tonight?

PS: feeding and patting the sharks and stingrays sounds sooo wholesome!! I have never done this. What was that like? 🤩