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Something’s not right

I can’t cope

Captain24Senior Contributor

I can’t cope

Hi. I’m new and have never been in anything like this before.
I’m really struggling with depression at the moment and just need a place to vent.
there is no reason as to why I feel this way. I just hate myself and feel like I’m an unworthy and useless person. I don’t have a partner or many friends. I feel like I keep pushing them away when I’m down. I’m just not worthy of them. I hate life and just wish I would go to sleep and not wake up. I feel so much emotional pain inside but numb at the same time. None of this makes any sense but it just how I feel.

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In response to: I can’t cope

Ru-beeModerator

Re: I can’t cope

Hi @Captain24

Of course, you're always worthy of writing on here.

It sounds like you felt really misunderstood by your psychologist today. That would have been understandably really frustrating and upsetting

Is there some way we can help to work through this anger in a safe way?

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

ArraDreamingSenior Contributor

Re: I can’t cope

Sorry. I just noticed when you kept saying people were watching you, that obviously worried me as it would most people, I didn’t mean to overstep or offend you… just worried for you and reached out to make sure you are ok, as people do when someone is distressed. Won’t happen again.

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

NatureLoverSenior Contributor

Re: I can’t cope

Thanks, @Captain24 .

I'm sorry to hear you were feeling scared or unsafe last night 😥

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

Captain24Senior Contributor

Re: I can’t cope

I did something I shouldn’t have and then I went to bed @Ru-bee. I now have a dietitian appointment at 3. It’s pointless because I don’t listen to her.

I didn’t wake up feeling any better. I’m still angry. Maybe they are right and I’m am angry bitter person.

I felt like I was being watched @NatureLover. It was all in my head.

I did appreciate it @ArraDreaming and I said as much. I’m just scared that you will say stuff that hurts me or pressure

me me like you have done in the past.

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

ArraDreamingSenior Contributor

Re: I can’t cope

Ok

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

Captain24Senior Contributor

Re: I can’t cope

An actual beneficial dietician appointment. It was eye opening.

I was tiring. Now all I want to do is sleep again.

Sorry for everything. Sorry for being me. Sorry for having a meltdown last night. Sorry for being so scared. I’m sorry, I’ve never had anything like it.

If you want me to go then that’s ok. I will.

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

Ru-beeModerator

Re: I can’t cope

I'm so glad that appointment surprised you with how helpful it was @Captain24

Last night sounded like it was really frightening for you. There's no need to apologise for being scared, anyone would have been if they were experiencing that!

Glad you're here 😊

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

Captain24Senior Contributor

Re: I can’t cope

It’s the first time that we can see where my ED stemmed from @Ru-bee. I still wouldn’t commit to anything though.

It was terrifying and most last night left me on my own. I hope it doesn’t happen again. Thats why I wasn’t sure I should be here

In response to: Re: I can’t cope

Captain24Senior Contributor

Re: I can’t cope

I’ve pushed everyone away.

Im sorry. It’s ok for you all to not like me. I don’t. I hate me.

I will do this on my own.


In response to: Re: I can’t cope

tymeModerator

Re: I can’t cope

Heya @Captain24 ,

I read a lot of angry (?) thoughts and feelings here.

What's happening for you? I recognise some of these big feelings is not the real Captain24 I've known...

Has something happened?

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