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Trying makes it worse

Trying makes it worse

Hi,

I'm EternalFlower and I've been feeling completely overwhelmed, sad, and pessimistic.

I've tried and been a responsible patient and person, reaching out to various services when I started feeling scarily anxious and suicidal, 2 years back..

My Dr is new, a young guy who regularly admits he's inexperienced, and aside from some good jokes, he actually does very little

I notice how easy it is to blame myself that I don't feel better, a total shame spiral, but I wander if my treatments just are bad....

I wanted to chat and hear anyone and hope I can use this space to help not feel so alone.

Thanks xxx EternalFlower

2606 replies

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In response to: Trying makes it worse

Re: Trying makes it worse

Hi everyone

I've been badly triggered and my mind is not good, it seems to be hating myself and regretting things I've done

My cm emailed me her draft of my dsp form, pretty funny, she really did nothing and what she did was inaccurate

They ask for Ur medical conditions and I'd listed symptoms, my psychiatrist had fixed it and said no need to write sy,proms, judt the medical condition itself.

She didn't heed this and wrote a list of her understanding of my symptoms....which is stupid.

I won't use what she wrote but I was just curious if she would help at all.

@Appleblossom @TAB @Former-Member @maddison

In response to: Trying makes it worse

Re: Trying makes it worse

Not all the new friends have worked out. @EternalFlower Kind but firm is a good mantra. When I am firm about something I am fairly mild so when it causes a "problem" I am trying to not take it as my fault, but that the relationship was not right for me. I used to compromise so much, I used to be a push over, so discovering how to keep my power and not always give it away is not easy for me. Those old habits hang around.

Today I had a zoom and went to Gp. She always takes a long time, so I went shopping for my grandson's 3 yo pressies and did phsyio exercises in the doctor's waiting room. lol I have wasted a lot of time sitting their in the past, and not in the mood for that. Ended talking to 3 different mums and a couple. So pretty cheerful. Finding Real friends has been hard.

In response to: Re: Trying makes it worse

Re: Trying makes it worse

Hi @EternalFlower theres a group on facebook just to do with applying for DSP, some of things read on there include like dont even bother unless your GP has done it before. I read elsewhere recently that unless your GP has had reports accepted previously, there is little chance it will get accepted. but there are specific sets of rules which are available if they could be bothered reading them

In response to: Re: Trying makes it worse

Re: Trying makes it worse

Ho @Appleblossom I haven't made a friend for 5 years ! But I think being really too open in the past I had lots of bad friends. I like to hear about Ur friendships and the mums, sounds nice, although waitingis not so fun.,

Hi @TAB this reinforces for me to not listen to a word she says

She diesnt want me on it either

My psych has got ppl on it before so I guess I'll go with him.

Makes me angry tho, I asked cm outright if she'd ever helped anyone with dsp, she changed the subject

Asked again, she said, nurses generally just know about it. Then she said to me, "sounds like a long form, u mentioned its 13 pages..."

It's 33 pages, and she should know that, I'm not going to follow her suggestions.

In response to: Re: Trying makes it worse

Re: Trying makes it worse

yes, people have their own boat to push, my latest GP gets all excited about me getting back to work after hurting myself, doesnt really do the same for me lol , guess I will just keep telling centerlink latest ailments, it got me a pension healthcare card for last 3 or so years anyway .. @EternalFlower i think there are rules re who has to fill what out, so might still need input from a GP not sure, good luck anyway another 7 years and can get age pension if they still have it by then

In response to: Re: Trying makes it worse

Re: Trying makes it worse

Hey @EternalFlower @TAB Just jumping in here to acknowledge the frustration around this and I don't doubt it can be hard work but it might be best to have a look at the services Australia website or speak to someone at centrelink as we don't know how reliable facebook pages are. I understand it's helpful to hear from others with similar experiences but also important to seek support from the professionals. I'm wondering if you are able to get a second opinion from someone else if you aren't happy with the care you are receiving @EternalFlower ?

Wishing you all the best with this and I hope you get the support you need 🌷

In response to: Re: Trying makes it worse

Re: Trying makes it worse

Hi @EternalFlower

How are you? I'm sorry to hear of the ongoing stress induced by your cm.

From what I read she indeed sounds quite overbearing & dismissive of you. I can totally understand how this interaction is affecting you negatively.

When people who are in authoritative positions, or who are meant to care for us treat us badly it feels horrible.

Instead of being able to forget about & move on, it seems to have larger impact that is not easy to overlook. It can make us lose faith in an entire system leading to feelings of confusion, hopelessness or maybe abandonment.

She's sound like someone who should not be in the job at all. Similarly, to what we are going through.

I think you are kind, wonderful & amazing! 👍 Try to stay positive. You are strong🙂

Remember also, that if the thoughts in your mind become too much, please reach out. We can't really control our brains! Don't ever feel bad or ashamed for asking for help ♥️

In response to: Re: Trying makes it worse

Re: Trying makes it worse

Hi @EternalFlower

Sitting at the mental health clinic with my housemate, waiting for his cm - depot due.

Are you ok?💗

In response to: Re: Trying makes it worse

Re: Trying makes it worse

Hi @maddison

I hope it all goes well with the CM.

hanami 💮

In response to: Re: Trying makes it worse

Re: Trying makes it worse

Thankyou @hanami

Word from the top is, "We're looking into it." (Re: changing CW's)

😕

I appreciate your support👍

221 - 230 of 2,606