Not sure what's out there.

Hello everyone,

I am new to this forum today and I'm not sure if it's my last resort to find out what resources are out there that are not therapy or counselling based but, physical/actual to promote motivation and connectedness through doing.

I am 50 this year and have been on Work Cover for the past 11 months due to a major breakdown triggered by a toxic work environment and domestic violence. My partner died in 2019 of a heart attack, 3 weeks after being found guilty of 4 out of 6 charges, so I have grief to add to the effects of what happened to me. We were in regional VIC but, moved to Melbourne with my two adult children in January 2020, six weeks before COVID lockdowns, which meant I have been isolated once again. Both of my children have Asperger's Syndrome, I don't know anyone in Melbourne and all my other family live in England.

So 11 months ago when I wanted to put my car through a wall, my boss suggested that I should go on Work Cover, which was the right thing to do. I have a psychiatrist, a psychologist, my GP and a Work Cover agent. I have been diagnosed with complex PTSD, Generalised Anxiety Disorder, BPD and depression.

I take my meds religiously, although they are not always successful i.e. sometimes they can make me groggy in the morning, sometimes I can't sleep and mostly only just keep me stable (and that is with medication changes). I have been admitted for a short time, attended Emotional Management therapy recently and am on the waiting list for DBT. For the past two weeks I have not had my once a week alcoholic drinks, eaten healthily, gone to bed around 9:30pm and doing my mindful meditations. So I am trying really hard to be kind to myself and also showering and brushing my teeth each day too.

However, no matter how much I am doing the doctors can't help with my loneliness. When I started the healthy routine two weeks ago I also managed to get outside and walk around the block for 10 minutes and I was proud of myself. However, nine days ago I think I had a bout of COVID because I felt terrible. I did not get tested because I am not at work and I didn't want my anxiety to go through the roof that I would get COVID queuing if I didn't already have it. I have been self-isolating but, now feel too lethargic to walk. This has effected me really badly over the last couple of days because I feel I need a friend to motivate me to walk and help me to get my strength back but, I have no friends.

I'm feeling stuck. I had to have three cortisone injections in my right shoulder two weeks ago and keep being told that stress etc. will exasperate the condition. The surgeon who administered the injection told me that my muscle tissue was beginning to thin out and my shoulder was becoming fibrous because of lack of exercise. This is playing on my mind so much that I decided to do some research about possible walking groups and maybe some art groups for me to try and connect with others as well as get some exercise but, for someone like me, do you really think there is anything out there. No there isn't 😞 So I've come on here to see if anyone knows of any formal or informal services in what I am looking for. I would love to meet others one on one or in a group setting. Just for my mental wellbeing, it would mean the world to me!

Thank you for listening to my long winded tail of woe.

You are all amazing! 🙂