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Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

I was raped a little over 20 years ago now. It was by someone I knew and trusted and it occurred in my own home. I was physically injured, concussed, ashamed, afraid, embarrassed - all the usual things.

I never reported it to the authorities and never spoke to anyone about it. I had never been a particularly social person, but afterwards I isolated myself completely other than heading off to work dutifully each day.

After 18 years of almost constant battles with anxiety, flashbacks, nightmares, triggers, etc, I finally sought help from a psychologist. Initially it was for pain management as I suffered a severe back injury about 2 years after the rape. So after almost 2 years of occasional appointments I finally told her during a particularly difficult time (anniversary) what had happened all those years ago.

So early last year I was officially diagnosed with PTSD. On my clinical psychologists advice I have undergone a series of Exposure Therapy and CBT last year. It was a long, arduous and extremely difficult process. However, it did help to some degree.

However the nightmares, anxiety symptoms, etc continued. This was probably made worse as last year was an extremely difficult one for me all round. My little 11yo niece was killed in a car accident, my brother seriously and permanently injured, I was retrenched from my job when the business was sold, and I found out that my husband was cheating on me again. So I guess none of that helped.

And then on 29th February this year it was the 20th anniversary of my trauma. It seemed to hit me even harder than usual, I dont know why. There just seemed to be triggering events around every corner, it was awful. I struggled very badly.

My psychologist decided to try EMDR treatment once things settled down a bit. She felt it would help with the emotional content of my traumatic memories. So between April and early September this year, I have undergone 10 2xhour EMDR sessions. I am now on a break to see how things are now.

But in the meantime she wants me to talk to people about what happened, as it is an important part of the recovery process she says. However I find this really hard as I do not have any friends (my hubby is a narsissist according to my psychologist). I have become very isolated other than for my part-time work which I was lucky enough to find in January. I do some volunteer work in the aged care industry, which I enjoy. But I just do not have any friends I am able to talk to. My family live a long way away, and I could never tell them anyway.

Although I am still unable to verbally speak about the rape, I can now write about it, and even think about it to some extent, without bringing on a panic attack. So that's progress. I hope that by discussing it further and by learning how other people cope with their PTSD symptoms, I can further desensitise myself from my traumatic memories.

Hence my decision to try an online forum. I look forward to responses from other people who have had similar experiences to myself. I am definitely more of a listener than a talker, so I hope that I may be able to be of assistance to others here as well.

Thankyou for taking the time to read my story.

2344 replies

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In response to: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

I lay awake again all last night. In the end I got thinking about what my psych was attempting to tell me during my appointment on Tuesday. I think it's finally starting to sink in.

Okay, so she said it needed to be all about self care right now, otherwise I am of no use to anybody, much less myself.

She spoke at length about eating properly and nutrition, and also getting adequate sleep. Yep, I think I've finally got it! It's not nice how a sleep and nutrition deprived, panicked brain fails you.

So, it's all about taking care of the basics ... right? Okay ... got it. So how do I go about doing that?

Firstly, the eating and nutrition bit - what are the reasons I am not doing that a little better than I am? A number of reasons that I can see - I'm not hungry, I couldn't be bothered preparing meals just for myself, I don't feel like going out to shop, anxiety symptoms are causing me to feel ill, it's hard to eat when you are on the verge of panic, eating is the last thing on my mind right now.

Secondly, getting adequate sleep - why is this such an issue right now? Certainly I am not getting enough sleep, I get maybe a couple of hours some nights and other nights absolutely none! Reasons? Nightmares, over-thinking, can't shut down as there are too many things playing on my mind, heart rate is really high and heavily thumping in my head all night long.

My current feelings of hopelessness, despair, fear, lack of appetite and subsequent somewhat alarming weight loss, are taking me right back to how I felt soon after my rape trauma. This is a little scary to me right now, and I think it concerned my psych on Tuesday as well. I guess that's why she warned me I was likely to fall into a deep depression if I don't do something urgently about self care.

Anyway I can't allow that to happen as I have people relying on me for support. So if anybody has some suggestions on how to get out of this rut I have found myself in, then I'd really appreciate your advice.

Yes okay, so exercise is one option, it may help increase my apetite and assist in a better nights sleep. But its just way too hard, I can barely drag myself around at the moment. I did 10 mins on an exercise bike yesterday, then practically fell off and staggered around like a blind drunk for 20 minutes after. I simply cant do it. Yes, forcing myself to eat something nutritious each meal time is important. And I am trying hard to do that, but I notice that I am continuing to lose weight. I just feel like I am barely existing right now, and I cant see a way through that.

@Faith-and-Hope @Shaz51 @Zoe7 @Former-Member @Former-Member @Spookytookims

What is everyone up to for the Easter long weekend? I'll be here on my own with no plans, so if anyone gets lonely, please give me a nudge!

Sherry xx

In response to: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Hugs @Former-Member I don't have anything useful to write at the moment but I just wanted you to know that I'm hearing you. Sending hugs

In response to: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Me too @Former-Member .....

I will drop in on you across the weekend here ..... you're not alone ......

❤️💕

In response to: Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

@Former-Member I will be on my own across the Easter period too so maybe we can hold each other up a little - I need that too at the moment

There is nothing more I can say here either - other than I am hearing you also and sitting beside you when you need.

Zoe

In response to: Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

your doing the best you can @Former-Member under the circumstances your under.

easters an extremely hard time for me and i pretty much dont celebrate it at all but atm not sure of the families plans, but ill drop in and say over the weekend

In response to: Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Hugs @Former-Member xo

One step at a Time my Friend , look at things you are doing , doing little bits , eatinglittle bits throuhg the day

I am seeing a dietician now and she wants me to do this , do that , write everything down , I was really getting overwhelmed about this and she wants to see me again and she wants to see some results

so my friend , let get through this together , tell me what did you do today ? xx

In response to: Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Hello dear @Former-Member

Just read your post and I am concerned about you. Sleep and adequate nutrition is so important - I agree with your doc that you could be heading for a major mental relapse if you don't get enough of the latter. I have suffered (and still can) exactly the same. Adequate sleep is essential to cope and avoid a breakdown. @Former-Member are you taking anything to help you sleep presently? If not I would highly recommend you speak to your medical professional about this.

I have had ongoing nightmares every night with little sleep for 16 months now and tried to battle through on my own strength. Did quite well for awhile but now it's taking its toll on my physical and mental health. So I have relented and am taking something to sleep every night now. It is helping a lot and has eased the nightmares greatly and I am sleeping better. It is helping my overall health and I am coping better. Trauma and ongoing stress, as you and me have been under past and presently, is majorly responsible. And this distress does make the mind overactive and near impossible to switch off (which the night meds help with), and I also lost my appetite and the weight was falling off (due to stress/anxiety). In my experience this can lead to a breakdown if it goes on too long so please look after yourself my friend.

Also what I found helps me to relax is to do those things that I enjoy like cross stitching, going out with a friend and really having a good laugh. When was the last time you had a really good laugh and fun time with others? This is so important to get out of a rut. And to stop ourselves from worrying all the time.

I am having a quiet Easter weekend so am here if you want some company as well. Tomorrow I am going to church for Good Friday, and then sometime over the weekend myself and hubby and going to inspect a house in a area we wish to move to. The latter is becoming g a very stressful event which has incurred a lot of heartbreak for me (long story). All my dreams seem to always go up in smoke - but it could always be worse I remind myself.

Please look after yourself my friend and ensure you get plenty of sleep. The lack of it does play havoc with the brain and coping abilities. I have had to force myself to eat at times - pushing myself to make nutritious meals and it has helped build up my strength and resilience. But there is nothing more healing, relaxing and rejuvenating for the mind and body than laughter and looking at the funny side of life for me. The best of medicine. Perhaps try and fit in watching a few comedies over the weekend - you would be surprised how much better a good laugh would make you feel. Something a lot of us whom suffer PTSD and mental stress have forgotten to do.

Here for you always. Hugs xxx💕

In response to: Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Hi @Former-Member

I am hopeless of the sleep side of things.

On the food - keep it simple

get into habit of always having a few things in stock, like carrots celery and fruit

grab things from the fridge rather than a packet

Cook up duplicate meals and freeze one

always have water around

Thats whats for lunch today for me anyway.

Dont fuss just do healthy food choices a litlle more

In response to: Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Just wanted to thank @Former-Member @Faith-and-Hope @Zoe7 @Former-Member @Shaz51 for your messages and well wishes yesterday.

I am having a very quiet lazy day today, not feeling like doing much at all.

I hope you are all having a lovely Good Friday. My best wishes are with you.

Sherry xx

In response to: Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Re: Living with PTSD (Potentially Triggering Material)

Hi @Former-Member. I want to thank you very very much for the trouble you took with your reply yesterday.

The only medication I am currently taking is meds currently used to help with ptsd-related sleep disturbances. I was taking a higher dose, but reduced it a month or more ago because it was lowering my, already low, blood pressure too much. I expect I would be better served by increasing it again, but as I am again experiencing very low BP again now (maybe not helped by not eating well), I am reluctant to do so. As for getting something else to help with sleep, I was meant to see my GP at the end of February, but have been putting it off. I guess I will need to go at some point however. I will soon need a review of my MHCP anyway, so I am not looking forward to that. Yes my sleep issues have been quite severe this time since about the end of January, and has not improved with all the extra pressures I have found heaped on me of late.

I'm glad you have found that cross stitch helps you. I have been doing some sketching, which I get quite engrossed in. So it is good for distraction purposes, at least for the time I am doing it.

I hope the house inspection goes well over the weekend, and that soon you are in a position to move to a new location. One day, your dreams will come to fruition! Have faith.

When I feel up to going to the supermarket, I will buy some of those sustagen drinks I think. Just to have some on hand for when I really cant face eating or preparing something to eat. Thats possibly a good idea. I am hoping that when hubby gets home next Friday after being away for 3.5 weeks, that I will at least be forced into eating a little better. I'm sure it will help anyway.

Great idea about watching some comedy movies. I will see whats on tonight. We have Foxtel, so surely there will be something on there to make me laugh! Trouble is, I keep falling asleep in front of the TV lately. Then just when I feel I must surely sleep, I once again lay awake all night ... thinking, thinking, thinking and stressing over things I cannot change. So frustrating.

Anyhow OverTheEdge I greatly appreciate your support and advice. Thanks for being there.

Sherry xx

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