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Something’s not right

On the edge

On the edge

I'm having a very hard time right now. I'll try and keep this short, but it will probably get long. Sorry.

A few months ago I was diagnosed with autism at 55 years of age. Up until that point I didn't even really know anything at all about autism. If I had known the slightest thing it would have been glaringly obvious that I'm autistic and my entire life would have made a great deal more sense.

I got the NDIS. Finally felt like I would get the support and help I have needed my entire messed up life. But after just one meeting with my support co-ordinator, everything shut down for xmas and I have been feeling incredibly alone ever since.

My husband is American and his mum is in the hospital over there and going into a nursing home upon her release. He is going over there for a month to get her affairs in order and visit with family. I stopped going with him on these trips years ago due to the stress it put on me (not understanding I was autistic and just thinking I was overly sensitive and 'precious'). Now I can't really go cause I have animals to look after here.

I have no friends. My parents are gone. My 2 kids live in QLD (I'm in Vic). I haven't seen my new grand-daughter at all since she was born and haven't seen my 2 year old grandson since he was born right before covid hit. I am in introvert and gave up on friends a few years ago after too many painful experiences. This doesn't really bother me when I have my hubby around and my best friends all have feather, fur and wool. But it became very apparent to me when I was doing my NDIS application just how dependant on hubby I am.

He told me maybe a month ago that he was going to the US in March and I was not happy about it, but OK with it. He usually goes for 2-3 weeks. I hate it when he is gone. It is really tough but I get through. This time I had spoken to my support co-ordinator about putting supports in place for his absence and I assumed I would have time to have some sessions with my pysch before he left, just to get my head on straight.
But then his mum got sick, and now the trip has been bought forward to this month and he will be gone for an entire month. I'm freaked out.

I will have no time to have counselling before he goes. I don't want a support worker right now cause of Omicron. As it was I live in a small rural town and would have to drive 45 minutes to go see a support worker, which I already wasn't thrilled about. I'm alone. I'm completely isolated. I'm scared.

I contacted Amaze via email and they sent me some resources around suicide prevention. I am honestly scared of what I might do alone for that long. I'm scared I might get covid and then there will be no one to take care of the animals. So I plan to stay away from people and shops and everything to protect myself.

I understand why my husband has to go take care of his mum. I'm just really worried about him going to the US right now with all that is going on there. I'm afraid to be alone for a whole month. I tried talking to Suicide Call Back via chat but no one was there. Due to my autism I don't do phone calls or skype or zoom or any of that stuff. Lifeline is also not great for that same reason. I just feel really let down and abandoned, which is not good for someone who is adopted and already has massive abandonment issues. I know people have to have a xmas break, but why now!! Why did this all have to happen now.

76 replies

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In response to: On the edge

Re: On the edge

I hope it all works for you and your sheep @Molly22 - everything crossed for you both 🤞💖

In response to: Re: On the edge

Re: On the edge

@Molly22 is your sheep still ok?

In response to: Re: On the edge

Re: On the edge

@Former-Member @Zoe7 Sheep update:

After the injections yesterday Daisy (the sheep) seems to be doing better. I don't want to get ahead of myself cause we have been here before but she has been very gingerly and infrequently putting her toe on the ground. She is not holding the injured leg up as high in the air as she has been doing. I'm hoping this is a good sign. Will just have to cross our fingers and hope for the best. Thanks for caring. I really appreciate that. 🙏😘

In response to: Re: On the edge

Re: On the edge

Hoping that Daisy continues to improve @Molly22 = all signs good so far so will keep everything crossed for you both 🤞💖

In response to: Re: On the edge

Re: On the edge

Hey @Molly22 How is Daisy doing? How are you Hon?

In response to: Re: On the edge

Re: On the edge

@Molly22 I hope Daisy is still ok! I hope you're coping as well and I hope you're not struggling too much.

In response to: Re: On the edge

Re: On the edge

@Former-Member @Zoe7

I don't even know what to think with Daisy anymore. Last week the vet felt that the only option left to us was amputation. Nothing we give the infection kills it. But we can't do surgery for a month as hubby leaves in 2 days and I can't do any of the things involved by myself.

We just gave her the last shot of anti-inflammatory, not that it's doing anything to help. There is a new abscess. Only small, but I guess the puss needs to come out somewhere. Hubby thinks it looked better than it did, but I think he is only saying that to make me feel better. Pretty sure when I send the pics to the vet she won't agree.

I'm not doing so great either. Only 2 days to go. Hubby has been working almost full time before he leaves (normally only one or two days a week). So I have been pretty much on my own. I'm tired. I'm sad. I'm feeling deflated and defeated. I think about you guys all the time and being more active on the forum but I'm not always sure how to reach out. Part of my autism I would guess. I did read a few posts from others with the idea of offering help or support but to be honest I really don't know what to say. Hard to try and fill up someone else's cup when your own is all but empty.

In response to: Re: On the edge

Re: On the edge

This is sad to hear @Molly22. Your husband sounds like a very loving man! You are blessed to have him! Yes, this sounds like a bad situation for your sheep not to be getting better. Has your husband been able to find anybody who can help out with her and yourself when he's away? Or could Daisy stay with the vet? I know I'm sounding hopeless I just don't know what else to say either.

In response to: Re: On the edge

Re: On the edge

Hey @Molly22 We can only do what we can Hon and right now you need support. There may come a time when you can provide that for others but for now it is more than okay that you are here and have our support. 💖

In response to: Re: On the edge

Re: On the edge

@Zoe7 Thanks for that. I just thought that maybe I could take my mind of my woes and help someone else, but I'm barely keeping my own head above water right now. I think I'm going to have to try and reach out to the SANE support people. One of the hardest things right now is trying to hide my feelings from my hubby as it doesn't help him any to see how much I am struggling.

My support co-ordinator is meant to be back from xmas holidays today. Will be interesting to see if he reaches out. I'm not all that likely to reach out to him cause to be honest I wouldn't even know what to say. Being completely new to NDIS I'm sure what I could even ask for that would help at all.

@Former-Member The only people we even know in town are our next door neighbours, and by 'next door', they are half a km a way. She is having her own health struggles right now and her hubby works away during the week and is only home on the weekends. I don't think Daisy could stay at the vets for a month. I don't think that would be good for her and the vet surgery is about 45 minutes away. Her normal vet is a mobile vet cause of how rural we live. I think as long as she is plodding along she should stay here with me. The problem will be if she goes further downhill. That's my big fear. I would rather not do an amputation until hubby is back. I just have to hope she doesn't go septic. I just love her so much and wish to god she would just heal.

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