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no choices

seamusunseanSenior Contributor24 Sept 2016, 6:05 am AEST

no choices

Gday im 45 just coming out of a divorce where my children have been systematically taken from me after being a stay at home dad for around seven years. My ex walked out claiming she was living a single life anyway . I kept the kids but started to struggle when she locked me out of our joint account . I was in shock and not copping . Her parents bought her a new house . I was struggling to keep food on the table and pay the bills when i decided maybe it would be best if the kids lived with there mum who had financial backing of her parents . Thats when the lawyer letters started claiming i was mentally unfit to see my children...anyway long story ive basically lost every thing now with a 20,000 debt and still dont get to see my kids ...the courts dont even seem to care about anything i have to say im constantly agreeingto her demands to at least get a supervised visit or phone call....now im giving up feeling like the system agrees with her and im better off out of the picture ...ive started saying goodbyes to friends and family ...my heart constantly aches for my boys ..ive missed so much already ...sick of crying and cant function...last ditch effort.

179 replies

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In response to: no choices

seamusunseanSenior Contributor08 Nov 2016, 10:03 pm AEDT

Re: no choices

Rang help line...on hold to long and hung up...thought i posted on here before but not here ...done trying

In response to: no choices

seamusunseanSenior Contributor08 Nov 2016, 10:05 pm AEDT

Re: no choices

See it now ...came up when i posted last

In response to: no choices

espritSenior Contributor09 Nov 2016, 7:18 am AEDT

Re: no choices

Hey mate. No choices means the only thing you can control is yourself and your life. I kinda feel that maybe your x wants you like this. Don't let her win this too stay calm and strong Can you go away for a bit. Distance might be an answer. Is there somewhere you can go. Just an idea. This will all work out . I've lost everything but I'm used to my new life now and I'm ok with it. Best wishes.

In response to: no choices

seamusunseanSenior Contributor09 Nov 2016, 9:36 am AEDT

Re: no choices

Thanks mate...all i think about now is going...

In response to: no choices

seamusunseanSenior Contributor09 Nov 2016, 2:36 pm AEDT

Re: no choices

Not seeing my kids hurts to much now...

In response to: no choices

espritSenior Contributor09 Nov 2016, 8:18 pm AEDT

Re: no choices

You will see them again. If you go you won't and they won't see you. It's the black dog! Take it easy one hour at a time one day at a time. Believe it will get better. Believe

In response to: no choices

seamusunseanSenior Contributor09 Nov 2016, 8:21 pm AEDT

Re: no choices

They have been told im sick in the head and dont want to see them...cant do it anymore..im trying ...cant stop crying now

In response to: no choices

espritSenior Contributor09 Nov 2016, 8:32 pm AEDT

Re: no choices

It's ok to cry. Cry it out. Let it all out. Feel the feelings they say. Big hug. My dad had late onset schizophrenia and I can tell you I loved him more than anyone in the world. Your kids a young trust me they will work it out.

In response to: no choices

espritSenior Contributor09 Nov 2016, 8:33 pm AEDT

Re: no choices

Go to emergency if you feel your really not coping mate. 🙏🙏🙏

In response to: Re: no choices

AppleblossomSenior Contributor09 Nov 2016, 8:34 pm AEDT

Re: no choices

Yeah I got the "sick in the head line" and it left me with over 40 years of research to get to the bottom of it. He had no other family. My brother started it to understand his father and male issues, but once he was gone, I continued. It was the only way I could understand half my genetic stock. I have a very good and full picture now of the stressors and pressures.

Break things into small steps and basics. The painting of one parent as mad ... for marital disharmony reasons always has a terrible kick-back on the kids.

Dream up a suitable home base. Small and humble. It wont matter. At some stage kids do need to know both sides of the story.

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SANE acknowledges the Traditional Owners of Country throughout Australia and recognises the continuing connection to lands, waters and communities. We pay our respect to Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander cultures; and to Elders past and present.

SANE values diversity. We are committed to providing a safe, culturally appropriate, and inclusive service for all people, regardless of their ethnicity, faith, disability, sexuality, or gender identity.