Connect with people who understand what you are going through, seek advice and surround yourself with support. We're free, anonymous, and professionally moderated 24/7.

47,612Members
1,358,869Posts
1,400,000Visitors

no choices

seamusunseanSenior Contributor24 Sept 2016, 6:05 am AEST

no choices

Gday im 45 just coming out of a divorce where my children have been systematically taken from me after being a stay at home dad for around seven years. My ex walked out claiming she was living a single life anyway . I kept the kids but started to struggle when she locked me out of our joint account . I was in shock and not copping . Her parents bought her a new house . I was struggling to keep food on the table and pay the bills when i decided maybe it would be best if the kids lived with there mum who had financial backing of her parents . Thats when the lawyer letters started claiming i was mentally unfit to see my children...anyway long story ive basically lost every thing now with a 20,000 debt and still dont get to see my kids ...the courts dont even seem to care about anything i have to say im constantly agreeingto her demands to at least get a supervised visit or phone call....now im giving up feeling like the system agrees with her and im better off out of the picture ...ive started saying goodbyes to friends and family ...my heart constantly aches for my boys ..ive missed so much already ...sick of crying and cant function...last ditch effort.

179 replies

41 - 50 of 179

1...4 5 6...18

In response to: no choices

KurraSenior Contributor24 Oct 2016, 10:39 pm AEDT

Re: no choices

Hi @seamusunsean
You must be devestated. What arrangements were made for your access to the children?

In response to: no choices

seamusunseanSenior Contributor25 Oct 2016, 1:15 am AEDT

Re: no choices

2pm to 10am every second Saturday supervised by my older sister and the children must sleep at my fathers house which is next door . Before that 3hrs every Saturday supervised.

In response to: Re: no choices

AppleblossomSenior Contributor25 Oct 2016, 1:35 am AEDT

Re: no choices

hi @seamusunsean I had a lot of shock and sense of betrayal from my family .. which effected my access to my daughter.

You had the gumption to get up and go to the court cases. Thats one on the board for you.

Get a home base .. whatever it is .. viable for now .. things may shift and change in the future .. these things are not always set for good.

Glad you have a bit more time with your boys ... they need their dad.

Maybe its also the small town gossip .. dont know your situation fully .. but I wish I had more access to my dad too.

Live it proudly .. even if you feel a bit under your family's thumb for the overnights. Dream up a few good things to do with them .. not too outlandish ..take care of YOU and them.

In response to: no choices

seamusunseanSenior Contributor25 Oct 2016, 12:18 pm AEDT

Re: no choices

Haven't seen my boys for over a month now i refused to put my family through it anymore....i cant even function properly now let alone get help...so much to do but paralysed by my efforts....hurting real bad now....not going to court no point

In response to: Re: no choices

AppleblossomSenior Contributor25 Oct 2016, 8:11 pm AEDT

Re: no choices

It is a step up that you are trusted and not under supervision the whole time. Things can change.

In response to: no choices

seamusunseanSenior Contributor25 Oct 2016, 8:16 pm AEDT

Re: no choices

But i am under supervision all the time i have my children...i dont understand what you mean

In response to: Re: no choices

AppleblossomSenior Contributor25 Oct 2016, 8:17 pm AEDT

Re: no choices

Sorry I thought it was just when they were overnight they were to be with parents.

In response to: no choices

seamusunseanSenior Contributor25 Oct 2016, 9:12 pm AEDT

Re: no choices

No my dad lives next door hes 87 my sister lives there to shes about 10 years older than me both are supervisers dad had a very minor stroke about a month ago i dont really get along with him ....anyway thats when i said enough is enough i dont want to cause anymore stress for them and also the one time i did take them over from my house to stay the night they looked at me like whats going on why cant we stay at our house ....broke my heart....no court tomorrow just end of avo i think...im just over it keep crying nobody seems to be able to help or care including me now....i just make things worse i cant even help myself so maybe their right maybe i am a danger to my kids i dont know anymore...got a sheriff's card in my door today things are starting to mount up even more....cant even function no food hardly left ...anxiety today paralysed ...alone

In response to: no choices

seamusunseanSenior Contributor25 Oct 2016, 9:16 pm AEDT

Re: no choices

Dad only parent mum died of alziemers about 5 years ago now....feeling like shes the only one that would have beleived in me.....miss you mum

In response to: no choices

seamusunseanSenior Contributor27 Oct 2016, 3:06 am AEDT

Re: no choices

Hmmm just had 4hr text out with an old friend having the lonelest year of her life and appologising for relying on me so much bahaha bahgurgle snort...me mr reliable...heres one of my ramblings...Thats funny...youve relied on the most unreliable person in my world...life eh the same only different...you worry to much....dont mind the little things...remember your the only one that can be you ...dont be afraid embrace it but accept what comes of it...like im a smart arse idiot im ok with that no one does it like me though i garantee it...sweet dreams your a beautiful soul you just have to beleive it and accept your beautiful faults ...good and bad ...yin and yang...life and death...you wouldnt know one without the other...same only different...life-love ......hearing practice what you preach much....

41 - 50 of 179

1...4 5 6...18