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Living with Loneliness

Living with Loneliness

Feelings of loneliness occur when there is a mismatch between the amount of meaningful social connection we want and the amount we have. So while loneliness can be caused by isolation, it can also be felt when surrounded by people, and in friendships, family and intimate relationships. It is a personal feeling of social isolation

Loneliness can be really hard to manage and studies have shown it can lead to poorer physical and mental health. Physically, loneliness can cause low energy, poorer sleep, headaches, worse experience of physical pain and addiction. Mental health wise, it can cause anxiety, depression, poorer self esteem and thoughts of suicide. Often this can even lead to further isolation and feelings of loneliness for each person.

In Australia, 1 in 3 people report feeling lonely and socially isolated. This means that there is a chance many of us here on the forums experience loneliness, especially given that many of us have or care for those with lived experience of complex mental health concerns. It’s important for us to share that experience and find connection and support.

Questions for the community:

  1. What does loneliness look like for you?
  2. How does loneliness feel and how does it impact your wellbeing?
  3. Are the periods of the day or year when loneliness is harder to manage?
  4. What have you done to manage loneliness, do you have tips for others?

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We recognise that loneliness is experienced differently for everyone and we welcome all stories this space. Please remember to be safe and respectful of eachother, you can find the guidelines here. If you experience any distress whilst reading along with this discussion, please reach out to Lifeline 13 11 14 or the SANE Help Centre to speak to a counsellor.

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In response to: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

@PeppyPatti I thought that was a picture of a fairy. 🧚

Then I had a close look 👀

It’s two sea turtles copulating BAHAHA 🤣

So FUNNY 😆

G

In response to: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

Dear @Lila3

I must acknowledge that before I couldn’t get my head around WHY I was being bullied by important people in my life. I could not see myself through. I was walking around like in a daze……

Why was this happening to me? What have I done wrong ?

Why was I so attracted to very dangerous people ?

Then at 55 years old, I got it, I began to understand it was not my fault.

I need a LOT of support what will not stop anytime soon. It’s exhausting too. I just cannot understand

why I need so much support.

Because Im done. Ive done the work. Set me free and let me be free

but it’s not like that.

I need medication

I need antidepressants.

I need the mood stabilisers.

From an acquired brain injury.

It feels like I want to go screaming to my two adult sons and yell, this is not my fault. Be my friend, but if I did that, they will run away and think Im crazy. ATM right now they definitely don’t.

You and me need to remember good health hey ?

I paid for an ancestry family line thing that you spit in a tube and it’s sent to Ireland and they can tell you your family line. It’s just starting to come through….it will take another two weeks to finish but Ive just discovered my Great Grandparent's…….

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

@PeppyPatti Having any kind of mental illness makes one more likely to be a victim of violence (statistical fact). A lot of people mistakenly believe it means
you're more likely to be violent.
This isn't the case. Yes, long-standing untreated mental illness can put people at risk of committing violence/ harm.
The victimisation rates amoung those with psychiatric conditions are far higher than the perpetration rates. Lots of things might contribute to this: poor social support, lack of resources, dysfunctional family dynamics etc.

The positive is that with appropriate support & and treatment, we can live well. We can have full lives.

I'm excited you're exploring your heritage ☘️

In response to: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

Hey @PeppyPatti , you and your son in two different time zone isn't it?

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

Dear @Lila3 @Tilz

I'm having a lot of fun watching Netflix

I feel that iv had a pretty full-on meeting with my therapist --

I agree with you @Lila3 -- what surprises me that how much support I need.

It's okay -- I get it --- are you like me ?

 

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

Ahh what a gorgeous red gum image!

I have multiple mental health problems. I get tired very easily & its hard for others to understand.

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

Thank you @Lila3 Im so glad that you are here. Me too, me too, people don't understand me. I get hugely anxious and say things too.

I like how you write

Thank you about the picture. I'm not ready to draw yet but I enjoy putting pictures up.

In response to: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

i struggle with loneliness every day.

i believe in toughness, your not a man if you have emotions. so i laugh whenever my problems are issued publicly. i may seem like a funny and happy guy, even to my closest friends and family, but deep down, i feel like...

i cant describe it

i go through everyday, waiting for when i can crawl back to my room, and shut the world off. i am alone then. i feel like i will never be good enough, and that i will be alone forever. for if anyone ever really knew me, they would leave me.

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

You say you love the rain, but you open your umbrella when it rains

You say you love the sun, but you find a shadow spot when the sun shines

You say you love the wind, but you close your windows when the wind blows

This is why I’m afraid, when you say you love me

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

Hey @Emmy2 welcome to the forums!!!

i'm so sorry that you've been dealing with loneliness for so long, it must be so exhausting having to hide it from others. even though society tends to associate men with being 'tough', men are just as human as any other gender, and as humans we all experience emotions - the good and the bad. you are allowed to cry, feel sad, feel lonely, feel hurt, just as you're allowed to laugh and to be happy.

i really liked your poem too, i can relate to struggling to trust people and show my true version to them.

even though you feel loneliness, i hope it brings you some comfort to know that you're not alone in that feeling here. we are here for you. it takes a lot of courage to reach out and share how you truly feel, i'm so glad you were able to come here and do that today. do you have any supports you can talk to about this?

we also have a lovely community here you can connect with, feel free to introduce yourself in the welcome thread and join in the newbie's social circle! There's also more threads relating to loneliness that you can check out if you'd like to read about other people's experiences.

we're so happy to have you here 💗

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