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Living with Loneliness

Living with Loneliness

Feelings of loneliness occur when there is a mismatch between the amount of meaningful social connection we want and the amount we have. So while loneliness can be caused by isolation, it can also be felt when surrounded by people, and in friendships, family and intimate relationships. It is a personal feeling of social isolation

Loneliness can be really hard to manage and studies have shown it can lead to poorer physical and mental health. Physically, loneliness can cause low energy, poorer sleep, headaches, worse experience of physical pain and addiction. Mental health wise, it can cause anxiety, depression, poorer self esteem and thoughts of suicide. Often this can even lead to further isolation and feelings of loneliness for each person.

In Australia, 1 in 3 people report feeling lonely and socially isolated. This means that there is a chance many of us here on the forums experience loneliness, especially given that many of us have or care for those with lived experience of complex mental health concerns. It’s important for us to share that experience and find connection and support.

Questions for the community:

  1. What does loneliness look like for you?
  2. How does loneliness feel and how does it impact your wellbeing?
  3. Are the periods of the day or year when loneliness is harder to manage?
  4. What have you done to manage loneliness, do you have tips for others?

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We recognise that loneliness is experienced differently for everyone and we welcome all stories this space. Please remember to be safe and respectful of eachother, you can find the guidelines here. If you experience any distress whilst reading along with this discussion, please reach out to Lifeline 13 11 14 or the SANE Help Centre to speak to a counsellor.

834 replies

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In response to: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

Thank you

Determination is one of my strengths.

In response to: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

Dear @Salvia

@cloudcore @Josie72 @PizzaMondo @Doldip15 @Former-Member @tyme @Shaz51 @TAB @saturnzoon @Meowmy

@Jacques @Adge @Lila3 @Bill16 @outlander

@Appleblossom

I'm here with you. Yes, my step dad and my ex-husband tried to take my 2 sons away - I think I get elements of your story and the pain. How no one understands you.

Please take heart.

At this very horrible time please take care of you. Reach to the computer to write to us

Can you work out who is your support team ?

Is it your Gp? Can you ask your Gp if you can access a caring group like Silver Chain so you can get some debriefing ?

Please take care of you. Remember those cups of tea where you can just have a little sit down and look out the window ....

Being gentle ......

Being kind. . .....

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

hey there @Salvia @Josie72 @PizzaMondo @PeppyPatti

Thanks for the tag PeppyPatti 🙂

Ive been reading back through the posts here and there is so much resilience through adversity, I am completely inspired by how the devastation has brought forward resources within that may not lead to perfect solutions, but the strive to reclaim rightfully what is missing is such a heartwarming thing amongst the poignant hardships people face.

Its an honour to be amongst people with such resilience ❤️

I live with loneliness because I have immune disease... no pets, no friends, no social events, no venturing into the community, lest I get sick.

Prior to having changes in immunity, I would be out there doing what I could to contribute to society and happy to be working. However, this issue has changed my life in many ways, one of the main ones being perpetual isolation (I even go buy fuel in the middle of the night to access the night counter so I dont have to enter the shop and risk exposure - even while wearing gloves and a mask, and having a virus resistant spray on my clothing and shoes), sine late 2018.

I draw inspiration from the resilience in the stories shared here; people telling their story in the midst of hard times shows how resilient they are to be here, and type ❤️

It's inspiring to be linking arms with you guys.

It really makes my day.

I would like to gently remind you of that on the days where things seem a bit too much for you...💜🌺

...this last week has been a bit much at this end, and yet, I am lucky enough to have had tags, tags, and more tags from the stand up folks on SANE forums.... 🙂

@Birdofparadise8 @Shaz51 @Snowie @Pem @Healandlove @tonys @Acanthiza @8ppleTree @Asgard @Xibon @TideisTurning @Spirit_Healer @tyme @saturnzoon @Adge @ArraDreaming @Appleblossom @Oaktree @Josie72 And all you guys I havent tagged because your tag has momentarily slipped my memory for the moment, but whom I would also like to give genuine smiles and thanks to 🙂

In response to: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

Persitwnce & stubbornness serves women well! Cherish these traits & allow them to bloom

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

That hit me hard...driving at night to get fuel. I was just lying on my bed crying. The linking arms metaphor lifted my heart
THANK you.

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

Hey @Lila3 ,

Please know you aren't alone, even if you feel lonely, know that we are here for you.

Most people have felt lonely at one point or another in their life and can certainly relate.

Were you able to practice something pleasant for yourself today?

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

@Former-Member

Sweetheart, thankyou for responding. .. I'm so sorry what your dealing with. You have always caused an impression with me because of your empathy and understanding of others.

@Jacques is like this . .....??

may I ask a question ...... I just heard this saying in an audible I'm listening to the audible spoke that loneliness happens because you don't have people around you to understand you.

What do you think ? Seems a bit simplistic to me....

@Birdofparadise8 @Shaz51 @Snowie @Pem @Healandlove @tonys @Acanthiza @8ppleTree @Asgard @Xibon @TideisTurning @Spirit_Healer @tyme @saturnzoon @Adge @ArraDreaming @Appleblossom @Oaktree @Josie72 @Shaz51

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

Hey there @PeppyPatti 🙂🌺

thank you kindly for your comment, give me a nice feeling of being seen from behind the screen 🙂🌺💜

With regards to loneliness being attributed to a lack of understanding from people around..I guess in a way it does make sense, however from my perspective, I see this statement as nuanced, and needing further unpacking to decipher what parts of life aren’t understood (is it a mismatch of boundaries, for instance), and how does it take into account the concept that people who are alone (having nobody around them) can still not feel a sense of loneliness, being content to be without close or significant connections?

From my own experience and from what I have learned, loneliness is one of those things that is very personal, individual, and self-defined per person; and lesser so a term that has a broader explanation that covers a multitude of people… I hope that makes sense? 🙂💜🌺

a very good question, and worthy of more discussion.. 🙂🌺

@amber22 @TideisTurning @tyme

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

@PeppyPatti thank you so much for the tag. Really good read

In response to: Re: Living with Loneliness

Re: Living with Loneliness

Yes, it does need further unpacking.

I'm very different - in a good way - than my immediate family. That's my three brothers and Mum. My two 30+ aged sons seem to learn compassion as they get older.

I feel like all I care about is the soul. That's it.

Loneliness feels bad when you have high anxiety

Loneliness feels bad when your trying to do the right thing when your kids were little but your single, working and you just don't know where to turn.

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